Hard To Write

Posted: June 9, 2011 at 9:15 am

*deep breath*

I sit here with an overwhelming sensation. A sensation that normally does not plague me as I produce blog post after blog post after blog post. Nervousness. Fear. Anxiousness. The thought of what I will share in this post puts me in a more vulnerable place than ever. It goes beyond my comfort zone of divulging crazy ideas to Peter. It breaks down the safety barriers of vagueness and general musings. It challenges me to say “I believe!” instead of “I wonder?”.

A perfect storm of forces has come together to drive me towards trusting in myself to go after these thoughts that have tugged at my heartstrings for longer than I care to admit. Tugs from God. Fitbloggin’ discussions. Reading Jillian Michaels’ book Unlimited. Coming across a plethora of blog posts about taking action. Devotional reading after devotional reading on using the talents God has blessed upon us, letting go of fear, and dreaming big. All of those things have joined together to get all up in my face trying to say “Tina, you need to DO something!”

But…but…but…but. That scares the shitake mushrooms out of me!!! Turning my dreams into action. No longer keeping my dreams hidden in the depths of my mind, but instead attempting to create them in my life. Uhhh…uhh…uhhh. I couldn’t possibly. Could I?

Yet if I hope for these things to ever blossom into a butterfly and break from the cocoon of my inner wishes, I must believe in them and in myself enough to speak them aloud. Sure, saying them doesn’t mean they will come true, but it does give them the chance to come true. I don’t want to avoid a challenge because a fear of failure. I don’t want to tiptoe around the path I trust God wants me on because of uncertainty in the outcome. I don’t want to half live my life.

So, I sit here at my computer. Sweaty palms. Racing heart. Big dreams.

I want to help others achieve their fitness goals. I don’t want to wait to start.

Before, I always anticipated getting into personal training when both kids were full-time in school. I refuse to commit to working out of the house on someone else’s schedule before then. Lately though? I have the urging to go ahead and pursue that dream of personal training by focusing on online training services and possibly local boot camps or something similar on my own schedule. I plan to order my study materials for the NASM certification after I return from vacation and get certified by the end of the year. Did I really just say that out loud? *deep breath*

I want to share my story – in a book.

I want to go in depth with all the nitty, gritty details of what led me to binge eating, the body image struggles I faced, the hit-you-in-the-gut emotions, the lessons I learned, the challenges I continue to encounter, and everything else that fires me up on the topic. I have always felt a reason existed for what I went through and for the longest time – even before I ever knew about blogging – I pictured using my experiences for others in this way. I believe I do that now through FFF, but something keeps telling me its possible to go a little bit beyond this small platform. Within the next year, I hope to start pursuing that call. Did I really just say that out loud? *shaking*

So…my dreams. Publishing them means I believe they can happen. Publishing them means I believe in myself. Dare I hit publish? *deeeeeepppppp breath* I dare.

  • Does sharing your dreams scare you? Why or why not?
  • Any dreams you before thought were unreasonable, but then accomplished?

Tags: ,

 
169 Comments to “Hard To Write”
  1. Andrea says:

    You can do it!

    We are here to support you!

    I would soooooo buy your book!

  2. I literally squealed a little when I read this … just because I love your blog, and think you have a fantastic story to tell. I would absolutely purchase a book of yours!

    I think sharing dreams is a way to help hold yourself accountable, but I agree … it is a very, very scary thing to put yourself out there like that. Yet another reason why you are such an inspiring lady. 😉

  3. Bari says:

    This was exactly what I needed to read today. I’m struggling with some of my own dreams – dreams that I’m afraid to say outloud and have only spoke to a few people about. The reactions have been very mixed, which makes wanting to chase them even harder.

    But, “All of our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them”. Thank you for this.

  4. jobo says:

    I have SUCH faith in you, you are the ideal person for this type of committment to personal health. If I lived in your area, I would absolutely take you up on personal training. I am in awe of you pursuing your dreams…this is huge and awesome and so so perfect. GO YOU!!!!!!!!!!!

  5. Meg says:

    You GO girl! You are superwoman and I am so excited for what the future has to bring for you!!!

  6. 🙂 You would an ideal personal trainer!! You’re so motivated, motivating, and inspirational. You’re just the kind of person that a PT needs to be!

    Congrats on admitting your dreams! I still have a lot of dreams I haven’t told anyone/told many people about. I need to work up that courage!

  7. Katie says:

    I have no doubt in my mind that you cant pursue and make these dreams happen! U are an amazing, strong, and driven woman!

    Life is too short to not do what you want!

    xoxo

  8. Strangely enough, when I started reading this post I already knew that you were going to reveal just that! It’s because it’s just so obvious that you have a great story to tell that would make for an awesome book. Go for it!

  9. Karolina says:

    This is fantastic, and I’ll definitely support you in this effort. I’m so excited for you!! Live your life as a daring adventure!

  10. Sara says:

    This is exciting news! Putting yourself out there like this is a scary thing. I would definitely buy your book.

  11. Announcing your dreams to the world solidifies them! Congrats! I’ve done a lot of things I never thought I could/would do by announcing them. It keeps you accountable.
    Rock on! You will accomplish your dreams!

  12. Good for you! I’ve been toying with getting certified myself and would love to hear about that process as you go through it.

    Someone once told me to talk about your dreams to others as much as possible. It makes them more “real” and you NEVER know who is listening. Good advice, I thought. 🙂

  13. Brenda says:

    THis is wonderful news!!. I loved reading this as I am a SAHM struggling to persue my passions. I just started pilates training and will get my certification and I am so happy that I took the leap as you will.
    I feel you already are teaching all of us. I can’t wait for the book 🙂

  14. Becca says:

    LOVE THIS! Congrats on making the decision!!

  15. What an exciting moment in your journey!

  16. Lisa says:

    DO IT! I think it will be great for you.

    For over a year I debated on whether or not to write my story about losing over 100 pounds. I have a loyal following to my blog and people seem inspired by my story. I felt like I had a good story to share but I was too scared to try. I kept telling myself “who would read this? Would anyone ever want to publish it?”

    Well I recently decided to just DO IT. I started writing and I’m about half way through writing the first draft of my memoir. It’s been an eye-opening and liberating experience to write about everything. It may never get published but I am enjoying the process. 🙂

  17. Awesome! I think those dreams really suit the you I know through the blog and definitely will be great!

    I have a hard time verbalizing my dreams because if things change feel like I drop the ball or let myself down. I guess I have a hard time rolling with the punches. I’m actually contemplating persuing some new physical challenges in the gym, but I need a kick in the pants!

  18. Ameena says:

    This totally resonated with me…I have huge dreams to publish a book and once I wrote it on my blog I instantly regretted it. Because now people ask me how my project is going and since I don’t have an agent or a publisher I feel a bit like a failure! But that’s just me…I care too much what other people think.

    Congrats to you…I think your book will be fabulous. I love your writing style.

  19. Colleen says:

    Go Tina!!!
    “If not now, when?”
    I’m excited to follow along with your journey!

  20. Sam says:

    WOW!! you are such an encouragement. thanks for posting 🙂

    i’ve been lurking on your blog for a while…just now getting around to commenting. thank you for sharing your story. you inspire me daily!

  21. Amanda says:

    YOU’RE AWESOME! I totally commend you for taking the fear inside you and saying “Ummm, no thank you!.” I think it’s a great idea for you to write a book. I love the quote that you included from Walt Disney as well. GOOD JOB!

  22. That is so awesome Tina! You should definitely write a book!!

  23. Tina, I fully believe that you can reach both of these goals. You are so amazing and will be great as both a trainer and an author. Thanks for such an honest post 🙂

  24. Lauren says:

    I love your dreams and I say, go for them NOW! 🙂 You are amazing and just for having and sharing these dreams shows the kind of strong and dedicated person you are.

  25. Errign says:

    You can totally accomplish your dreams – you have so much support behind you and such a positive, encouraging outlook on life!

    I think the idea of sharing my dreams scares me because I wonder if I’m jinxing them. or if they can’t happen, if I’ll be more disappointed because other people would know I failed.

  26. Sarah says:

    Yay! You go for it, Tina!
    I think saying the things that are closest to our hearts are sometimes the scariest because they’re most truly US and after they’re said, there’s no turning back.
    (The no turning back part is a very good thing.)
    I’m excited about watching you blossom and fly:-).

  27. It is very hard to share your dreams. I almost did yesterday on my blog and I held back! Thank you for the inspiration! You can do it!

  28. lindsay says:

    tina, yes yes! God has called you to do this. I see his love in your writing, in your life. I can assure of that! what a blessing and a gift in one. Go for it! I will be here to cheer you on, fears and all!

  29. Ela says:

    Yaay! You can totally do it: You just demonstrated that!

    I’m so glad to be reading this, as I feel like I’m in a similar space of figuring out how big to dream–a few steps behind you. I love that you know your passion and are taking courage to pursue it.

    And when time comes to preparing your book, I’m a darn good editor, and would love to help you!
    love
    Ela

  30. vivoir says:

    Go for it- I’m studying for my REPS2 Exercise 2 Music and it’s extremely interesting. It’s enabling me to pursue my hunger for new information, but with a purpose that will extend beyond myself

    Do it for YOU. Do it for others 🙂

  31. Céline says:

    Go for it!
    You’ll be a great personal trainer – motivational and caring.
    It seems like a perfect fit.
    Be proud of yourself for sharing your dreams (that’s tough stuff).

  32. Sometimes saying your dream out loud is the hardest part. You have the kind of drive that it takes to succeed in whatever you put your mind to, and I know people will be inspired by your story in book form as they have been by your blog!

  33. Becca says:

    Oh, I’m so excited for you!! Go for it!
    When you’ve finished, I expect an autograph in my copy. 😉 (I’ll have to come find you and get it signed in person!!)
    Sharing dreams can be a little scary, but I have every confidence in you! You’re a great writer–you’ll be a great author, and you’ve already got a “fanbase” that’ll support you and read the book and suggest it to other people!

  34. Laura says:

    You can do it! Look how far you’ve come already. You inspire so many of us 🙂

  35. Katie H says:

    So exciting! I would totally purchase your book 🙂

  36. Rebekah says:

    Hi Tina! Long-time reader, first-time poster :). I just want to say that I’m so proud of you! Your journey is inspiring and I’ve definitely been blessed by what you have shared through your blog. God has shaped your story for a reason and it’s to touch the lives of others. I will definitely be supporting you through my prayers. YAY!!

  37. Dawn says:

    You have a story to share that will help others. Put your mind towards what you want to accomplish and there will be nothing that can stop you.

    I have been fighting a lot of my fears this year and it feels amazing. I’m still working on my personal training certifications so I know how much information you are trying to remember.

  38. Angela says:

    Congrats Tina!!! I think the first step in reaching for any goal is to have one, and say it out loud! I know you can do both if you set your mind to it. I agree that sharing dreams can be scary, especially when you’re not fully confident as to how to go about achieving them in the first place. Having said that, talking about things with others can lead to new opportunities and connections, which may not have occurred if you’d kept your thoughts to yourself. You go!

  39. I have such faith in you Tina! I know this is something that you can and should do! You’ve helped me just by reading your posts and I know that you can help so many more people out there!

    I can’t wait to hear more about your book and your ideas!
    Best of luck to you!

  40. Amanda says:

    I love this! It must have been hard to write but you did the right thing. You can tell yourself things over and over again in your head – and even tell other people about it – but once it’s down on paper (or a computer screen), it’s there and can’t be taken back. I can’t wait to see what you do!

    • Tina says:

      Exactly! It was very nerve-racking to write this out because it does gain a sense of permanence. I know you can relate. 🙂

  41. Tina, you will be an amazing personal trainer AND an amazing author – I have no doubt. Your blog is so well written and helps me on with so many different parts of my life all the time, I could only imagine what your BOOK could do for people. I have complete faith in you and am so proud that you are taking the courage to do this!!

  42. Michelle says:

    You can do it!!! I have been so inspired by your blog since I started reading it, and I know you will continue to inspire and help people as you share your talent with others. You go girl!
    I need to have more strength to pursue my dreams as well, so thanks for the motivation to do so!

  43. I love you – and your dreams! I believe in writing down goals because if they’re written down you are more bound and determined to make them happen. I say GO FOR IT!!!

  44. Liz says:

    You got this! Good for you!

  45. YES! You put it out there–it will happen! <3 you

  46. Missy says:

    Go on and get it girl!
    Imagine, Conceive, Believe, RECEIVE!!!

    PS- Love the shitake mushroom saying (though I may not be able to think of them in the same way) and I will be stealing it from you okay?

    You will — WILL– write an amazing book and doing so will give you enough elssons to write another one just about that.

    Get out there and kick some ASparagus.

  47. Jess says:

    You can SOOO do it!! So happy/proud of you!!
    I know you’ll pass your certification/your book will be amazing!!

    <3

  48. Holly says:

    I have the exact same dream as you. I have a BS and a Masters in Physical and Health Education and I to want to get certified. I thought I wanted to wait until both girls are in school full time (4 year old going to 1/2 day preschool next year and 2 year old still home with me) but I don’t know if I can wait! Good luck! I will be doing the NASM also whenever I do decide to jump in and take the plunge!

  49. Haley Q says:

    Love this! I recently ran across your blog and figured this was a good time to comment-your story is so encouraging to me! I’ve been through alot of similar things and God definitely led me to your blog to show me that I’m not the only one that’s struggled with binge-eating, and not only that but that He is the answer! Can’t wait to read your book 🙂 Good luck!

    • Tina says:

      Don’t you love how He can bring everything together? So glad you crossed paths with my little space. Now we can connect and inspire each other. 🙂

Leave a Reply

(required)

(required)


 

 
Catch Up With Recent Posts

Announcement Time

Posted: November 23, 2011 at 7:47 am

Well, I have had a whirlwind of a few weeks over here. I missed all of you so much! I can’t express enough gratitude for your patience while I got some important things sorted out. Some scary things. Are you ready for the announcement? Here goes! I will no longer be blogging at Faith Fitness […]

88 CommentsRead more →

Self-Love Reflection: The Road Not Taken

Posted: November 20, 2011 at 11:47 am

Hello FFF readers! Nice to meet ya! My name is Carissa and my husband and I blog at Fit2Flex.  Well, I blog…he consults! We are both certified personal trainers with a passion for healthy, active living and clean eating.  I am also studying to become a registered dietitian, a race announcer, and a runner.  Stop […]

24 CommentsRead more →

Healthier Eating For Kids

Posted: November 19, 2011 at 10:56 am

Thanks to Plum Organics for sponsoring my post about tips for baby feeding magic. What if you let baby choose what’s for dinner? Check out their cute "Quest for Yum!" video and see what happens! As parents, we want the best for our children. We help them to feel loved. We strive to teach them […]

14 CommentsRead more →
 

Announcement

Posted: November 17, 2011 at 3:36 pm

Hey, everyone! I wanted to pop in and say I am working on some new and exciting changes.  As a result,I may not be posting as much during the coming week.  Please stay tuned for the big announcement! Love you all! And still feel free to find me on Twitter and Facebook for the time […]

21 CommentsRead more →

Where The Change Happens

Posted: November 16, 2011 at 7:54 am

It’s kind of funny. I become a certified personal trainer and the first workouts I turn to this week come from someone else. The book came in for me at the library last week and, after flipping through it, I couldn’t wait to give the circuits a go. Making The Cut includes a lot of […]

79 CommentsRead more →

From Beginning To End

Posted: November 15, 2011 at 11:53 am

Good morning! First off, thanks for the many congrats yesterday. Love you all bunches for the tons of support you have given me in so many things this year. I hope I can return a little bit of that love through this here blog as well. So yesterday I had my first parent-teacher “conference” for […]

55 CommentsRead more →