Self-Love Reflection: Forgiveness Helped Me Lose The Weight

Posted: October 30, 2011 at 8:33 am

Welcome to another Self-Love Reflection! Carrie from Shrinking Carrie shares with us her weight-loss journey and the “AHA!” moment she had along the way. Enjoy!

Well hello FFF readers! I have been reading FFF for a few months now, and I am so
honored to be able to mix my little world with Tina’s for a post! I have found many
thought provoking subjects, as well as funny life anecdotes, and I love how Tina
keeps it real by sharing experiences, both good and bad.

I blog over at Shrinking Carrie, where I try to show motivation and inspiration
through weight loss. I am on a journey to lose 120 pounds so that I can be a healthier, happier, mother and wife.

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I have been overweight almost my entire life. I did have a couple of years when
I was in my early 20’s when I did some unhealthy crash dieting and lost about 90
pounds. I met my amazing husband in 2001 and we got married the following year.
Needless to say, the weight all came back and then some.

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Throughout the past 9 years of marriage I have tried every diet imaginable to lose the weight, but with no success. After being married 4 years, we decided that
it was time to start a family and so I saw an endocrinologist to make sure that I was
capable of even having kids.

She bluntly told me that I was too fat and needed to lose weight. I was hard on myself and, after hearing that I was “too fat”, the only thing I wanted to do was hide in a closet with a pint of Ben & Jerry’s. I ate all of my feelings and, each year that passed that I didn’t get pregnant, I gained a little more, and hated myself a little more. I felt like I was being selfish to my unborn child by not losing weight, and that I was putting food over my baby.

Then a miracle happened. After 5 years of trying to have a baby, I got pregnant.
I had a hard pregnancy considering that when I delivered I weighed 296 pounds
and had to deal with Gestational Diabetes. But when the delivery was all said and done (emergency c-section) I had the most perfect little girl. I had a little girl that I needed to be an example to.

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I was so ecstatic to be a mother that I decided I immediately needed to make some
changes in my life. I felt that my calling in life was to be the best mother I could be to my baby and I didn’t want to waste my life feeling sorry for myself, or whining about the obstacles that had been put before me.

How do you start a journey that you’ve tried to start a million times before? I racked
my brain for answers that I could never find before, and then it came to me clear as
day. Forgive myself. Forgive others.

Forgive myself for the negative self-talk and the countless times I failed in the
past. Forgive myself for not taking care of my body, and giving it the love that it
needed. Forgive myself for wallowing in self-pity when I could have been making
my situation better and promoting positivity around me.

I forgave others. I forgave family circumstances that were beyond my control. I
forgave the kids that made fun of me for being “fat” when I was young. I never knew that forgiveness was the diet I never tried.

After I had forgiven myself, and others in my head, it was like a weight had lifted off
of my shoulders. I had been carrying around so much bitterness from the past it
was literally weighing me down.

I started my blog to help me with my accountability, and I vowed to try and show a
positive and inspirational message through my writing. I have found that positivity keeps me losing weight and helps me to not revert back to old bitter ways. It seems to all go hand-in-hand.

I hope you will check out my journey so far, and hopefully get some inspiration
along the way. I know that blogging has helped me to go to the next level of self-
loving and I hope that it shines through in my words! Thank you Tina for letting me
share my story with your readers!

  • What has helped you in your journey to be/stay healthy?
  • Ever had an “AHA” moment to a life long question?

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19 Comments to “Self-Love Reflection: Forgiveness Helped Me Lose The Weight”
  1. What a great testimony!! And it really does come down to loving yourself and being ok with forgiveness!
    P.S. your little one is adorable!

  2. Rachel says:

    Thank you so much for this post. I too have been struggling with weight even now. i totally understood that terrible feeling of anger and bitterness at myself and especially the other people that called me fat. it really, really REALLY sucks. i think i too will need to learn how to forgive those people, which is gonna be hard because they were soo hurtful. but now that i’ve actually said.. “they WERE hurtful”, i guess i’ve actually forgave them somehow. its a good step towards a change. thank you again for this post. made my day, no doubt. :) all the best CARRIE. you rock.

    • Thank you Rachel! The hardest part for me was admitting that I let other people hurt me. I like to pretend that I am a strong women, but it hurt when people said certain things, and half the battle was admitting the way it made me feel. Thank you for your inspiring words!

  3. Katie says:

    Wow! Good for you! Thanks for sharing your journey toward a healthy life. You are an inspiration and brave for sharing your story. I loved when you talked about forgiving yourself for bad choices. We’ve all been there – and forgiving yourself is probably one of the hardest things to do. I’ll be following you on your blog! Wishing you the BEST!

  4. Hi Carrie! What an incredible story! It’s amazing how much impact what we feel emotionally can have on us physically. I’m excited to check out your blog!

  5. Tina says:

    Hi Carrie, so glad to have read your post today. That is so great that you are in a good place with yourself now.

    I will definately be checking out your blog. I struggle with binge eating/emotional eating and also wanting to loose weight. I love reading stories like yours and Tina’s. It gives me inspiration.

    • Thank you Tina! I feel so much inspiration by the kind words that people have said. We are all in this together, and need to inspire each other as well! I feel inspiration by all of the wonderful comments people leave!

  6. Hilary says:

    So true! I think attitude matters a lot more than we realize when it comes to weight-loss. It’s far to easy to hate yourself when there are things about yourself you want/need to change.

  7. What a wonderful reason to get healthy, Carrie! I’m sure she’s 110% worth it alone ;)

  8. Thanks for sharing your special journey with us! I can’t wait to read more on your blog! I think forgiveness is definitely key when someone is on a weight loss journey. It is just one less thing standing in your way to become the best you there is!

  9. Diana says:

    Carrie’s story is so inspiring, and the “forgiveness” message is one I think all women can benefit from, no matter their particular weight or health journey. Thanks for sharing! :)

  10. [...] didn’t have a chance to catch a read over the weekend, check out Faith, Fitness, Fun for my Self Love Reflection guest post!  And if you are a new reader thanks for reading, let’s be friends, [...]

  11. [...] didn’t have a chance to catch a read over the weekend, check out Faith, Fitness, Fun for my Self Love Reflection guest post!  And if you are a new reader thanks for reading, let’s be friends, [...]

  12. Jen says:

    Whoa. I needed to read that. I didn’t realize how badly I needed to read that. Someone just tweeted this and I just happen to see this post. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I REALLY needed to read this. I need to do some forgiveness as well.

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