i cannot tell a lie

Posted: August 19, 2010 at 11:55 am

Last night, we had a meeting at 6:30 at our church to discuss small group leadership. Instead of stressing myself out trying to cook a meal, finish it on time, and get us all fed and out the door quickly, I decided to stop for something on the way. Perhaps some Subway, a grilled chicken sandwich from Chick-Fil-A, or Panera. In other words, the original plan involved a healthier dinner option on the fly. That did not happen.

Why? Well, simply because I wanted something different. I craved something very abnormal but could not deny it and figured I shouldn’t. That thing I hankered for so suddenly…

IMGP6197

Oh boy! Peter finds it humorous that I get cravings for McDonalds randomly while pregnant. I do not eat it otherwise. I do not care to in the least. Yet for some reason during pregnancy (both times!) the salty, greasy, usually nasty food calls to me. Last night it happened. I will admit – at first I thought “I can’t go there!!”. And then when Peter asked jokingly if I would dare to share it on the blog, my gut instinct answered “maybe you wouldn’t have to”.

I snapped myself out of it quickly enough and thought why does it matter?! I shouldn’t deny myself for the sake of a label of “healthy” or “blogger”. I shouldn’t gloss over it for fear of what others think. I know for myself that I make balanced food choices. That I take care of my fitness. And that I love myself enough to respect cravings and not feel guilty about them.

In the past, I would have limited myself from having what I wanted. Then…I would have binged. If that didn’t happen, anxiety would overcome me and my mind would swirl with thoughts of food with no room for anything else. Now, I can eat something like McDs (very rarely mind you) and move on. I can simply eat the meal and not fret over it, living by example so M doesn’t feel that guilt eating certain things. I can head to a church meeting without guilt distracting me and focus on the topics at hand regarding my new role in developing a stronger community and bringing people closer to Christ in my church.  I can know without a doubt that the next day I will pick up where I left off and not feel I blew it and eat recklessly until the following Monday when I could “start fresh”.

IMGP6202 Start the day off right with an oats, greek yogurt, honey pb, + dried cranberry/raisin/cherry mix.

Even though I will hit publish with a bit of nervousness, I drown it out by knowing - I can be me. I can be balanced. And I can still be healthy.

  • Have you ever been nervous to hit publish? What post? Share a link if you like!
  • What is something you like to eat or do that does not mesh with the standard definition of “healthy”? How do you feel “healthier” for allowing it?

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59 Comments to “i cannot tell a lie”
  1. Woohoo I like this post a lot!!! I think it’s totally fine to eat “unhealthily” one day, then realize that you don’t have to feel guilty because you KNOW you’re going to go back to a healthy lifestyle the next day. I know there are foods much more sinful than my weakness, which is Werthers Originals. I could eat these by the bagful (and I certainly have, with big stomach cramps to follow!) but they’re just so so so good! I’m a massive sucker for caramel and butterscotch flavours and these little babies get me every time! I try to keep them out of the house but lately, using the “everything in moderation” mantra, I happily welcome them once in a while!! :)

  2. Heather says:

    Haha! You’re too funny ;)
    Yeah-I’ve hesitated to hit PUBLISH on a post I did about how and why I hate halloween.
    Aaaaand the I love that doesn’t mesh well with my lifesyle is BACON!!!!!!! YUMMMMM :)

  3. Hello, my name is Kara and I am a candy addict :-) Healthy Living Blogger AND candy addict….good combo right?

    Even though I love candy I try not to eat it much and when I do I make sure it’s really what I want so that it’s worth it!

    I usually don’t eat at McDonald’s either, but every now and then I just want a hamburger from there soooo bad. And I get it!

  4. Mandy says:

    LOL! You are too funny. You are so normal and that is very refreshing :)

    I have to have something sweet every day. If it wouldn’t make me weigh 1000 pounds I would gladly eat ice cream every day, LOL!!!! But I usually limit that to once a week hahaha

  5. Funny you should blog about this because I’ve been CRAVING Mcd’s like CRAZY lately. Don’t know why… But sometimes you just have to go with it..

  6. This is an awesome post Tina!

    For so long I have felt so guilty for my cravings and I felt especially guilty when I gave into them! I would deprive myself for so long and then literally go hog wild at McD and feel awful about myself.

    I haven’t been blogging long enough to have one of those “nervous to publish” moments — but I’m sure I will.

    Good for you for sharing this with all of us — and I love what you wrote about picking up the following day (or meal) and be balanced and that you don’t have to wait until “Monday” — because that is also something I did for so long!

  7. Girl don’t be nervous!! I think it’s pretty funny/cute :) And hey…everything in moderation – even if it’s a pregnancy craving for McDonald’s!! :)

  8. Breakfast looks delish by the way. I was so nervous about posting pics of me in a bikini and the pics of me when I did my home gym post. I am really quite modest so I was totally freaked out and also don’t want people to think I’m fishing for compliments or anything like that. I guess I eat pizza at least once a week, but I do try to make it healthier and it’s typically vegan. But I won’t deny myself a good cheesy slice either. It should be about balance first and foremost. Life is too short and there is no guarantee that just b/c I eat super healthy, never take a drink, and always work out that I will live any longer than anyone else.

    • Tina says:

      Good point. We can do our best to care for ourselves and give ourselves the best life possible, but there’s no guarantee its going to protect us from everything.

  9. Hahaha, I can’t say that I’ve been nervous about backlash when I publish non “Real” food… But a little part of me worries about losing readers who might not be familiar with a balanced approach to healthy living.

    Then I remind myself that my blog is for ME. I don’t dwell on it as a “failure.” Mostly I barely even mention it, just the required photo and description. Then I elaborate on all of my more Real choices for the day.

    Turning a bit of a blind eye to less healthy choices is more about focusing on positivity for me.

  10. You are human. Life is too short not to indulge on occasion, even in something super unhealthy. I’m not going to say that I’ll never have McDonald’s fries again or a Blizzard at Dairy Queen because that is unrealistic and because ONE doesn’t mean 100 and it’s OK to indulge on occasion. I’m never going to try to be “perfect” when it comes to food. I eat healthy 90% of the time which allows me that 10% extra when I feel like it (which is not often). No guilt, girl! :)

  11. Dorry says:

    I’ve felt anxious before about pressing publish several times – I remember specifically on my first post about my past with disordered eating. I realized it was putting me in a vulnerable position but I received positive feedback and it felt great to connect with readers on a real,honest level. :)

    • Tina says:

      I felt the same way when I first posted about my past and binging. I was so glad to get it off my chest though. The blogging community is great!

  12. Sometimes I’m embarrassed to reveal how many sugary treats I’ve had in one day! I don’t think I can go a day without dessert of some sort, but my blog puts pressure on me not to go crazy. Maybe that’s a good thing…

  13. Rachel says:

    I posted once about how I regretted taking out so many student loans in college. I was such a stickler about signing up for NO credit cards but still graduated 20k in debt because of the loans.

    Anyway, I posted it and my dad called me EXTREMELY upset about it. Something about how I shouldn’t post about private financial information (okay, fine) and that there was no other way I could have attended school without taking out those loans (I totally disagree).

    But in the interest of appeasing, I just trashed the post and removed it from the blog.

  14. oh girl, you dont’ have to be sorry or nervous about this! i eat mcdonald’s for breakfast once every two weeks…so it goes, but the rest of the day i keep it balanced with healthier foods!

    you’re so awesome :)

  15. Hi dear!!! I’m glad you DID POST! :) That means you are REAL!!!! No one eats perfect 100% of the time (well I guess some do but I don’t understand *those* kinds, hehe). Check out my last post, I tried a FRIED Oreo…hehe.

    It’s called LIVING :)

    Have a great day! XOXOX

  16. Tina, kudos to you for giving in to the craving and admitting it! I knew I was finally over my eating disorder when I could eat McDonalds when I wanted to (which wasn’t very often) and not feel guilty about it afterwards.

  17. Holly says:

    That only makes you human!!! In all honesty, I don’t think any of us want to hear how so and so has gone months/years without eating something most people wouldn’t eat in the blog world. Or maybe that’s just me?! I’m not going to lie…I get a MAD craving for a McD’s hamburger now and then, and I go for it! Not to mention, being pregnant, I think you get extra leeway. ;-)

    I have definitely hesitated to post certain things before, mainly because I am so terrified of what other people will think. But then I’ve just gotten over it and realized that most people like to hear it all – the “good” and the “bad.” More relatable that way, you know?

  18. Morgan says:

    You’re human and pregnant after all! Good for you for listening to your body and just enjoying!
    I eat all kinds of things that don’t mesh with the traditional “healthy” blogger ideal, and I just don’t care! I don’t believe in deprivation :)

  19. Jennifer says:

    Thanks for your honesty because I’ll be honest myself, my husband and I love Mc D’s. I don’t know why, but we truly crave it a lot. We have to back away from it because we know how unhealthy it can be to eat on a regular basis. But I understand that you might feel nervous about telling others about it because you promote health and fitness and Mc D’s doesn’t exactly fall into that category. But it really relates to my “Confessions of a Health and Fitness Blogger.” I crave bad food all throughout the week, have I ever gave into it? Yes. Do I do it everyday? No. Therefore, I label myself as someone who is constantly striving to be healthy and not perfect. So I’m glad you enjoyed your burger and fries. :)

  20. I bet you anything I’ll crave McDonalds too when I’m pregnant. My best friend (who was a vegan for years) craved McDonalds like crazy when she was pregnant. It was the oddest thing!

    I think it’s great that you shared with us! We can still be healthy living bloggers and eat junk food every now and again. Balance and moderation!

  21. Camille says:

    I guess it is healthy in moderation, but I eat a lot of bread. I mean, I could just continuously stuff it in my face all day. Sometimes I chose not to publish that :)

  22. It is definitely all a balance! There are plenty of things we eat around here…like monkey bread, but it is just one meal every so often. I do try to make those things healthier, but honestly with all the sugar and butter…it really was not what I would call healthy. I haven’t every cringed at pushing the publish button on food, but definitely photos of myself. I have just seen so many people get comments about their weight or how they look…it always makes me nervous.

    Your breakfast sounds delicious! I hope you are having a great afternoon!

    • Tina says:

      I can see that. It’s crazy how people will leave such nasty comments and with such accusations. And if they read the blog consistently they would know exactly how healthy those bloggers (normally) are.

  23. This post is exactly why I love this blog and you. You keep it real. So McDonald’s isn’t the healthiest thing in the world, but the way you react towards it and think about it, is totally healthy!

  24. I’d be lying if I didn’t say I hit the drive thru on occasion. More times than not it would be after a night of drinking, but it does happen. Eh. A little indulgence isn’t going to hurt anyone. :)

  25. Sometimes there is absolutely nothing better than Mickey D’s french fries. I think Im hungry now :)

  26. Lindsay says:

    Life is a Balance. We do not have to be perfect all of the time. I have struggled with disordered eating aswell and I know that for me whenever I thought of even eating McD’s I would feel guilty because the stigma around the food there is so negative. I mean there food might not be the healthiest, but in moderation it will NOT kill you!! :)

  27. Mireya says:

    I love this post! I have a very hard time feeling guilty about unhealthy cravings. The line that struck a chord with me is “And that I love myself enough to respect cravings and not feel guilty about them.” Thanks for helping me remember that I’m only human, I have a pretty healthy diet and just because I have a slice of cake or something similar doesn’t mean I totally blew it.

  28. Becky says:

    Sometimes we all just need some Mickey D’s! And that’s totally fine. It’s about enjoying it for that meal and moving on. No regrets, no guilt.

  29. Chelsea says:

    Great honest post. Your readers appreciate you sharing things like this! Makes you more relatable. I am still learning how to strike a balance with things like this. Your posts always inspire me to listen to my body, so thank you.

    Chelsea

  30. “I can simply eat the meal and not fret over it, living by example so M doesn’t feel that guilt eating certain things”

    Love this!

    It’s important to show our daughters what healthy eating looks like, but never should they feel guilty for eating foods labeled as “bad.” Absolutely.

  31. Don’t fret it! Everyone indulges now and then….I also have an “urge” for McD’s every once in awhile and I think it is okay. Just think, some people eat is EVERY DAY!

    • Tina says:

      I know! I even thought about that and how I can’t understand how people can eat it all the time. It tasted good but definitely wouldn’t suit me more than once in a blue moon.

  32. I think it’s lovely that you’ve shared this, despite feeling a little nervous/uncomfortable about it. It’s always nice to know that healthy living bloggers are indeed real humans, the kind who sometimes get cravings for greasy food! ;)

  33. Jess says:

    AMEN sista!!! I am seriously going to post something very similar tomorrow – and why? Because I indulged (and enjoyed every caloric bite) in the most decadent chocolate flourless-cake last night that my hubs made for me. And you know what? I did NOT feel guilty and am not ashamed of it. I am proud that I can be healthy and can still fit in an indulgence here or there and not guilt myself out of it. GO YOU and your bad McD’s self ;)

  34. Meg says:

    Amen to this! Everything in moderation! Gosh, people sometimes act as if they’ve commited a sin when they give into their cravings – God did not create food to be “bad”, he created it for nourishment, and pleasure!

  35. Don’t be ashamed! I crave McD’s and I’m vegetarian lol. The fries call out to me. :) It’s about balance and moderation, right? :)

  36. haha….i get nervous every time i push publish!

    i like to think i’m a healthy eater, but i definitely suspect i eat too much sugar. i eat cereal muffins like they’re going out of style. (and chocolate, if we’re being completely honest.) and i reason it because i do get my 4-5 servings of veg a day, and i don’t eat red-meat or anything deep-fried. i know we’re all allowed to indulge but yeah….i think i could probably use those muffin calories for protein instead. why do they have to be so darn tasty??? :)

    • Tina says:

      I bet you’re getting an okay amount if most of what you eat are veggies and other lean meats, whole grains. Its good to be mindful but I think we can’t stress over every way we can be healthier. There would be no end then!

  37. Thankyouthankyouthankyou for sharing this! It’s so refreshing to have a dose of reality. McDonalds is out there and while of course you wouldn’t eat it every day, I love that you can share your indulgences. We need to normalize eating… even when it’s not vegan, fat-free, 100% organic eating.

  38. Nichole says:

    McTotally Proud of You!

  39. Kristie says:

    Alright, so my food splurge that I know wouldn’t be labeled as healthy is definitely….

    Taco Bell. Yep, you read that right. I know it’s not real Mexican food, that the sodium levels are through the roof, etc., but it’s so good! Now it’s a way I’ll treat myself on long car trips instead of a once a week thing (like it was in college… haha). :)

    • Tina says:

      Looks like we all have our things. I haven’t had Taco Bell in forever but that’s mainly because I am soooo picky about Mexican. I remember eating it a LOT in high school though. And loving it.

  40. [...] yes, it can be done. Tina‘s post today inspired this quickie little post [...]

  41. Lee says:

    It’s definitely okay to eat something that’s not deemed healthy sometimes!

    I have two posts that come to mind when I think about things that I was nervous to post. One was recently when I was feeling inadequate at my new job and the other was a post when I questioned whether or not I drink too much.

  42. Katie H. says:

    Tina, I love this post. Your ability to be candid and open is refreshing.

    I was nervous to publish a post I wrote a few weeks back about how sad I was and how I was dealing with my husband’s deployment. It was good to get it out though :)

  43. Hayley says:

    Good for you for going with your gut! Pun intended.. :) I actually appreciate posts like these from healthy bloggers, because it shows that you really do live what you write and talk about on your blog – it’s all about balance! Even if you weren’t pregnant I think the occasional Mickey D’s splurge isn’t horrendous, especially when you eat so well the rest of the time. I don’t like it when I find a blog that says they eat everything in moderation and splurge on occasion only to discover that a “splurge” for them means eating a healthy version of chocolate cake (I’m just throwing something out there…I can’t think of a specific blog or post). :)

    There’s no reason for you to feel nervous about posting this – it’s your blog and I love your honesty!! Plus again – I appreciate these kinds of posts!

  44. I do have the same cravings sometimes too, usually when I have a hangover but it’s been months since my last BigMac and the less I eat it, the less I crave it :) it’s not a big deal and I appreciate you sharing that craving with us – we’re all human after all!

  45. homecookedem says:

    There is nothing wrong with a little fast food every now and then!! ;) I’ve had my share of chick-fil-a and wendy’s since being pregnant!! :)

  46. [...] will satisfy your craving like… yes, I’ll say it… McDonalds. (Love this post by Tina on [...]

  47. [...] Halloween candy on the blog yesterday, and a plethora of dinners out mentioned here. I even had an entire post dedicated to my “confession” of visiting a McDonald’s earlier in the pregnancy because I craved it and refused to feel [...]

  48. [...] pizza, hearty casseroles. Sweets sound good too – cake, candy corn, icecream, and cookies. Even McDonalds manages to squeeze its way in as an undeniable craving despite its utter lack of appeal outside of [...]

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