it’s pouring – my heart, soul, and emotions

Posted: August 31, 2010 at 11:04 am

I can hardly believe September comes tomorrow. Isn’t that what always happens, though? You await something with pure excitement, then the day oh so suddenly comes knocking on your door and you panic with nervousness. Yep. That’s me.

A few weeks ago I shared how I felt pulled to begin the 30 Days of Self-Love on the blog and asked for your support. The outpouring of support overwhelmed me and literally brought some tears to my eyes. To this day, as people continue to show their interest and let me know they are “in”, I get giddy with hope with what will come. Amidst all that, however, are some questions and insecurities.

I worry that it won’t be all I hope and that my posts and the shared reflections will fall much too short of what you all look for. I don’t want to let my fabulous readers and supporters down. I want us all to gain something from this and the fear of failure permeates my emotions.

I wonder how best to go about some of the technical posting details. I have recently gotten into a groove with my 2 shorter posts a day. They fit in my schedule well and make it easier to sit down to write with one concept in mind to share, instead of a day’s worth of stuff to sort through and try to keep to a readable post. I know I want the 30 days posts separate of anything else and posted in the morning by 8 am for people to have available to start their days.

So, I’m torn. Do I keep my normal posting and simply add the 30 Days posts in? Or do I exchange a normal post for the 30 Days post? I don’t want to overwhelm you with 3 posts a day. I certainly want the focus to be on the 30 Days and its participation, but would be lying if I said it wouldn’t bother me to do normal posts and those not get read. The 30 Days post will be very short and sweet, simply to spark some reflection and then allow for a comment to affirm part of your reflection, so I would hope they wouldn’t be burdensome when added with other posting, but it still worries me. I feel really silly typing that but I would be lying if I didn’t.

The last concern I will share (so as not to get too long winded) goes back to the beginning. Is it prideful of me to desire this to reach many different people? Is it wrong to have hopes and dreams for this movement/challenge? Was I crazy to even try this?

I can’t seem to help myself! I can’t even begin to describe how flustered I am to bother myself with such thought processes, but they are there. I want so badly for this to provide a positive experience for each person that it hurts. I will have to do something difficult. Even with all the faith I have, I still face difficulties with simply sitting back and trusting. That’s all I can do. Pray over each post and that God guides me to a message that can touch each individual. Pray for it to help us all love ourselves more and have a place of positivity and support together. And let Him do His thing while I’m just along for the ride. Bring. It. On. Please join us, will ya?

  • How do you honestly feel about the posting? Would it bother you with an additional post or affect your reading of the blog and/or participation in the 30 Days?
  • What do you have the hardest time with when approaching something new and extremely important to you?

I hope to see you all tomorrow with the first post!

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40 Comments to “it’s pouring – my heart, soul, and emotions”
  1. Jess says:

    If you have TIME to write a third post, I say go for it. If its too much in between everything else, I say make it one of your two daily posts and leave it at that. Whatever is easiest for you my dear. And NO – I do NOT think its wrong that you want this to reach so many people, I hope it does too, I really do! And I’ll be supporting it as much as I can on my blog too. 🙂

  2. I’d substitute your morning post. I’ve found that when people feel ob-blog-gated to post, the posts aren’t as entertaining to read and you can sense their lack of “wanting” to post.

    Remember that it is for fun and inspiration, so don’t bog yourself down with worrying- you’re an amazing blogger and the 30 days will be AWE.SOME.

    • Tina says:

      Well I wouldn’t feel obligated; I like posting how I do now; and i don’t feel like the 30 days would be THAT much extra posting work, but it still could be a lot. I think I’m leaning toward subbing the morning post. And thank you so much for your kind words.

    • HAHA! oh-blog-gated! too clever!

  3. I agree with Brittany. I think you should do it as your morning post. If you find that you want to do three posts as you work through the month, it’s no biggie to add an extra later in the day. I like it when bloggers start the day with a meaningful post, then taper off throughout the day.

  4. Leah says:

    Thanks for running this. I think it will be a great month. I’d start with 2 posts a day and if you have time, and want to get a third post in – do it. If not, its OK too!

    The 30days are going to be WONDERFUL!

    Thanks again….

    • Tina says:

      Good point. Nothing is set in stone! I think I’m going to start with keeping up the 2x/day post. Thanks for the input!

  5. I’m with Jess. Post in the way that’s easiest for you.

    Looking forward to reflecting!

  6. You could have 100 posts a day and I’d still read every one! Whatever works for you in any given day will be great.
    30 Days will be great, no fear!

  7. It is never wrong to have hopes and dreams, especially ones that are so positive for you and others. I am sure that this is going to exceed all of your expectations! Can wait to read about it.

  8. meghan says:

    i say focus on one thing and do it really well. only work on the 30 day challenge. and later you can write as much as you need and you’ll have a pile of topics to carry you through the following month.

    • Tina says:

      I know I wouldn’t stop other posting because otherwise I think my head would explode. Or my husband’s with talking his ear off about all my ramblings. LOL

      BUT I do like how you pointed out putting adequate focus and energy into the 30 days. That’s really important to me so I don’t want to overextend myself. Thanks!

  9. Shannon says:

    I think its great that you’re doing this and I am looking forward to reading. I don’t know how anyone has time to post 2 or 3 times a day, but if you can and you want to, go for it! But don’t feel obligated to post something extra. I generally only check in with someone’s blog once a day as it is.

    I think its great you want to reach so many people with this. Its a great message and I think the positive response is only the tip of the ice berg in terms of the people you will reach 🙂

  10. I think a self-love post in the morning would be appropriate… it would almost inspire people for the day. Then maybe do a mid-day post? I’m just thinking out loud here 🙂

    • Michelle says:

      I like this idea! Even if you start out doing it a certain way, Tina, you could always change it. You could do the 30 day of self love in one part of a post, and then talk about something else in the other part. As long as you talk about it, I think you would be owning the spirit of the 30 day challenge 🙂 Even if you start out a certain way, you’ll find out what works best for you as you do it and that’s ok with me!

  11. i say bring on the 3 posts if that works for you! i don’t mind being overwhelmed with blogs i love 🙂

    and p.s. i CANNOT wait!

  12. I say just play it by ear! 3 posts a day can be very time consuming, but I don’t think you’ll bore/overwhelm your readers – i think its up to you!

  13. Girl, you will NOT be a failure with this one. I think that as you get going you’ll figure out how to best fit it in to your blogging. You may do one post for this then one regular post. Key thing is not over-extend yourself and lose sight of the purpose of any of your posts. You are such an inspiration to so many people. You will not fail no matter what happens.

    • Tina says:

      Good points! I don’t want to overextend myself or lose focus on what is most important. And that’s the 30 days. Thanks!

  14. Mark says:

    As a reader, three posts a day isn’t a problem. I have days when I can get round to all the blogs I like, other days I just don’t have time. Do whatever suits you, it’s your blog. Just like everyone else, I read what I can, when I can. I’m sure I can make room for one extra post 🙂

    When it comes to starting something new, the hardest part for me is the starting. I am a perfectionist, which means I waste a huge amount of time figuring out the “best” way to do something. Then if I do start, I am constantly doubting my choices. I’m getting better though. I am learning that doing “something” is better than formulating a perfect plan and doing nothing :p

    • Tina says:

      That is SO me!!! I overthink things way too much. I’ve gotten better but I know I still do it. Especially with things I REALLYwant to turn out positive. I think that’s why I’m getting so nervous about the 30 days.

  15. Tina you do what works for you. If you start with 2x “regular” posts and a 30 days post per day, that is fine with me. If you have to drop down to 2 total per day, thats fine too. This shouldn’t be overwhelming for you at all!

    I am ok with either way, do what works for you!

    I know feeling failure just kind of happens, but please don’t — the fact that so many people are behind you shows that you are doing the right thing. How could this go wrong?

  16. stacey heald says:

    I think pride is when you want things to point back at you, to bring fame to you and not to God. For example, if you were really wishing your 30 days posts to bring more readers to your blog just so that you have more readers…that is pride. It is not pride when everything in you is desiring to have people read the post only so that they will reflect in a way that points them to God, to healing, to health, etc. I love that God works that way. He heals our ugly, broken places and then uses our stories (when we are willing to be vulnerable and share them) as He heals others.
    How do you know which it is (even though I think most of us know the answer already!)? If you had to, would you still do the 30 days posts on an anonymous blog even if that meant no one ever knowing anything about you? If your answer is yes, you’d still put the work into it and post even if it had no connection to you then this isn’t a pride issue.
    You have to know that even if you never got a single positive response re: the Sept challange it doesn’t mean it didn’t help someone. I think that those readers who are deep in the cycle of self-hate will have to use the 30 days as a first stepping stone to a new outlook and life. It may not be until much further down the road that they are able to articulate how these next 30 days effected them.
    All that said, there is no doubt that new readers will certainly benefit from the 30 days being attached to your blog because your heart cry for healing and health is evident in your posts. I hope that you don’t let fear drive out your excitement! Come on September!

    • Tina says:

      Thank you thank you thank you Stacey!!! Your reply meant so much. I hate thinking that hoping for something equals pride and you really explained it in a way that helps me feel better. I want it to do well because I want it to reach people. I don’t care so much about the blog outcome of it at all. I don’t think it will make much impact on that anyway. It’s not like I’m going to be (or even TRYING to be) the next Caitlin or something. LOL Thank you again for your wonderful words. They really helped.

    • Great way of putting it!

  17. I appreciate you sharing your genuine concerns. Whatever you choose to do will be a success, but here’s what I’d prefer. Instead of adding an additional post each day, I’d like this movement to truly get the spotlight it deserves.

  18. If it were me, I would add it in with my first post, but try it out, and if it doesn’t jive, then go the other way. I’m sure you’ll find that within the first few days of posting it will either fit or not fit:)

    • Tina says:

      I’m pretty sure I don’t want it mixed in with other posts. I think I’ll just focus one post solely on that and then one general “me” post. It could easily change though. Thanks for the input!

  19. Madeline - Greens and Jeans says:

    I would ditto everyone who said to use it as your morning post. I’m pretty sure a dose of self love is more important that a cup of coffee to get the day going!

  20. I think adding the 30 days to one of your existing post would be ideal both for you, and for people that only get a chance to stop by once a day!

    When starting something new that I am passionate about and want to success in I get very overwhelmed, and over think it!! I am very excited about the project, and have all the same emotions as you and for you at the same time!

  21. If It were ME, I’d use it as a morning post and then do 1 more post the rest of the day….but here’s the thing…you aren’t me, so you’ve gotta do what you want and feel like!

    I do agree with everyone else–keep 30 days post the best and the focus, but I’d miss your ramblings too much if thats all you did, so just do what’s in your heart and mind for the day!

  22. I would totally focus on the 30 Day posts. That’s the whole point, right? 🙂 I’m pumped to read your first one!

  23. Jolene says:

    I think three is absolutely fine if you have enough you want to convey in all three – don’t get me wrong, love the posts and can’t wait to read the self-love 30 days posts, but if you end up feeling too stretched or frazzled, I say nix the others for the 30 day post, or just do one of each. Whatever your heart desires, and we will follow 🙂

  24. Heather says:

    def wont affect my reading, do what you fel you need to do!

  25. There is really no wrong answer here. You should do what you feel is right and works for you. You should definitely not stress about it. If you feel like a 3rd post, I say go for it. We are all here for you!

  26. Shayna says:

    Dang Hawaii time! I’m always late to these things!!! :/ I’m so excited to see what you have planned. I’m sure between all the praying and your enthusiasm for this whole thing, it’ll be great! I read all the posts for the day in one big (obviously late) chunk anyway, so it doesn’t matter to me when you do it!

  27. I’m a bit late commeting on this, but I’d say you do whatever you think is best for you. If you feel burdened with 3 post, don’t do it 🙂 and I totally agree with those who said that the 30 Days posts should be in the morning, what a positive way to start the day!

  28. janetha g. says:

    i am still on board for the self love! sorry, i am just now getting a chance to catch up on my reader 🙂 looking forward to these 4 new posts and to see what they are all about! <3 oh and no worries on the multiple posts a day. if anything, people will enjoy it!

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