Sticking with the plan isn’t the only thing that took up some of my thoughts while at the gym last night. I also found myself in a moment of weakness sucked into that dangerous black hole: comparison.

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I was going about my Couch to 5K workout happily – feeling strong, healthy, and fit. I had a fantastic day earlier, thanks to B sleeping better and over the last week getting into a solid routine that makes juggling two much easier. [Side note: he even slept from 8 to 1 and then from 2 to 6 last night. Heaven!] I had confidence in what I have already accomplished fitness wise oozing from my pores. I love my body and it amazes me in all it can do. Then, it happened. She showed up.

So, there’s this chick at my gym. A lot of her fitness persona reminds me of myself 1.5 years ago when I felt at my personal best physically. Her body is very comparable to the physique I call my “happy place”. The workouts she completes resemble my favorite types of workouts and the way I love to challenge myself. Her energy and vibe appear so natural as she smiles and happily connects with other members over their workouts. And I found myself very bothered by this.

I caught myself saying things of annoyance about her in my head. Critiquing what she was wearing or calling her a flirt for chatting with some of the guys. Then it dawned on me. I was only doing these things out of jealousy caused by comparing myself. I had no need to think such things. She looked good. One of the guys she chatted with is her husband and his friends! They were talking about workouts – not flirting! Evidently my thoughts were completely jealousy related.

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The comparison trap and jealousy caused by it lead me to momentarily lose the satisfaction and appreciation of my body and achievements right now. Once I recognized that, I forced myself to stop. I don’t like to think negatively. I was happy just moments before and shouldn’t forget those great feelings so easily.

Then, I turned that jealousy into a positive. I remember I am working back to that goal and I have full faith that I can achieve those things again with ample time. I have the dedication and the love of fitness to do so. I also remembered that treating myself with respect and being happy with the journey were a key part to that success after Makenzie. I can’t lose that same mindset for this journey. And I won’t. I finished out my workout yet again feeling healthy and confident. Yet again believing in myself and loving my body for the amazing things it has done (creating beautiful children) and that it continues to do (getting back in shape so easily). Black hole averted.

Question of the Day – What do you do when you find yourself in the comparison trap or feeling jealous?

Catching up from the weekend? Check out these posts:

• Just What I Needed – girls’ night with my friend Mandy
• Where Did It Go? – wondering what I did Saturday and Sunday
• Weekly Series: FFF Features - How many push-ups can I do?
• Weekly Series: Self-Love Reflection - Trust Your Body

Last week Julie did a PSA on her blog because she wanted to clarify some misperceptions of perfection about her relationship with her husband, Ryan. After some comments and emails over the past week, I want to clear the air with my own PSA of a different topic: my workouts.

(warning: some parts of this discussion may have TMI as it is a post-partum topic)

I have received plenty of concerned remarks about how soon I have started working out again, they types of workouts I have chosen, how often I work out, etc. I do not doubt that the concern is genuine. Not at all. I do not write this post as a defensive one. With what FFF stands for, however, I want there to be no misconception  over whether or not I am trusting my body or approaching my Body After Baby journey in a realistic, healthy manner. So, this is my PSA to say you do not have to worry about either of those two things.

The American College of Obstetricians & Gynecologists states that women can gradually return to exercise as soon as they feel comfortable. My personal doctors/midwives felt 100% okay with me returning to exercise sooner than my 6 week post-partum appointment. They know my level of fitness. They also know my predisposition to things like depression, including post-partum, and that exercise helps me. They said to keep an eye out for increased bleeding and any pain/discomfort. If neither of those occurred, the exercise I completed was perfectly healthy for my body.

I rested a full two weeks after delivery, which during that time my post-partum bleeding almost completely stopped. It has not gotten heavier than the occasional very light spotting I had before picking up exercise. It has, in fact, continued to decrease. I pay close attention to my body and if anything felt uncomfortable, I would have no problem lightening up. I have not encountered a need for that. I honestly feel great with each and every workout. I feel appropriately challenged and energized, never fatigued or uncomfortable in the least.

Please remember, I have worked out regularly for close to a decade. I have trained for two fitness competitions. I maintained regular exercise during pregnancy. No one can compare what my body can comfortably manage right now to their own bodies or their own ideas of what is right. I have spent years working on getting more in tune with my body because I do not want to do it harm like I have in the past. I have listened to my doctors, but most importantly I have listened to my body…and it tells me that I’m doing just fine.

Once again: please note this message does not come from a defensive stand point. I appreciate every person who shows concern and know you all want the absolute best for me and my health. I just wanted to clarify that, while I do want to get back in shape, I will never push myself too hard or too soon.Thank you for listening!

Question of the Day – Is there anything you feel very strongly about with your reputation and sometimes feel the need to clear the air? I hope you all recognize the importance I place on loving our bodies and also, for me personally, in being genuine and honest (like I did with the scale dilemma).