I feel beautiful today. No, I don’t have a nice outfit on or my hair done up just so. In fact, I’m still hanging out in my workout clothes from this morning’s at-home full body circuit that left me sweaty. Don’t judge.

Understandably, I feel more beautiful today than I did 5-6 years ago when I was at the peak of my binging issues. Not surprisingly, I feel more beautiful today than I did 2-3 years ago as I sorted through the mental muck and finally began feeling in control of my food and emotional struggles. And despite the occasional down day, I have felt more beautiful each and every day since beginning this blog.

WHY? Writing this blog forced me out of my comfort zone. It made me vulnerable. The act of putting myself out there so publicly has reinforced my sense of beauty more so than anything else. Every time I peel away another layer of myself I open up another opportunity for growth. I learn more about myself. I become more aware and more grounded in who I am. I see my true self staring me in the face and cannot help but to love her. To love me.

Each step I take where I embrace vulnerability and expose myself gives me strength. Remember me and my pregnant belly in a bikini out there for the whole world to see? Talk about vulnerable! And strong. I know it took guts to post that. Yet I have never felt more beautiful in any other picture.

Just as I have never felt more loved than when I confessed to Peter my struggles with binging and cried many, many tears on his shoulder. Just as I have never felt more hopeful than when I finally turned to God and said “I can’t do it on my own. Help me love myself like you love me”. Just as I have never felt more powerful than declaring my hopes and dreams for my personal future publicly, despite the doubt and judgment some may share. Being vulnerable isn’t something to fear. It’s something to celebrate. It helps you more clearly see yourself…and YOU are something to celebrate too.

This post is part of the Self-Discovery Word by Word blogging series, started by Ashley last month. Click for more details on how to participate with your own post.

• What ways do you make yourself vulnerable? How do they impact you? Feel free to link up posts of yours sharing a vulnerable, yet empowering, moment.
• What moments and situations make you feel proud of who you are?

Evening, friends! I like what a lot of you mentioned in response to my last post about getting thoughts out on paper to help not over-thinking about them at night. I could benefit from that since my mind goes into overdrive if I don’t fall back asleep within 15 minutes. Also, I want to say that what I mentioned about HLS is not definitive. It was only through correspondence with Caitlin. She mentioned it wouldn't be likely and not to depend on it. I imagine things could change, so please don't go spreading word that I told you there will be no HLS or anything like that. Kay?

But, you know something? None of my lists nor my lack of sleep nor blog conferences feel very consequential right now. We got news earlier that Peter’s grandmother is not doing very well. She has been pretty ill for awhile now, but things apparently took a turn for the worse today as her kidneys started failing, among other issues. While I don’t know his grandmother very well, it pains me to see Peter’s hurt and to consider that M has never had the chance to meet her. They live in New York and we never made it up there to visit. It reminds me of how short life truly is and that we really can’t take things for granted. Cliché, but the truth.

I adore that poster. I want one for my refrigerator. For the remainder of my post, I will stick with the Q + A. I went through and picked out one of the more fun ones to pick up the mood of the afternoon.

How did you and your husband meet? What did you do on your first date?

It all started at a wine night with a group of girlfriends. I felt frustrated by men, namely the on/off ex of 8 years, which led to me going off to my friend wondering why she would want to get married. I actually expected to go through life in a never-ending drama cycle with the ex. I vowed that I never wanted to get married because the only man I would marry couldn’t exist. I then proceeded to list out the many qualities of the only man I would consider marrying trying to prove my point. My other friend turned to me and said “I KNOW HIM!!” From that point on she felt determined we were perfect for each other and strategized ways to get us to meet. Here’s a picture from the night that started it all…

For her 23rd birthday party, she knew I would be there ready to go out for a night on the town. I later learned she begged Peter over the phone to come out with us, even going so far as to fake cry. The rest of the guests were all coupled off, so Peter & I ended up hanging out together most of the night. The rest is history.

We went on our first date the following week. Spent the entire next few weekends together doing things like hikes, the pool, dinners, and movies. Then, I went to Europe for 2 months. I left thinking, eh this thing is no big deal mainly as a defense mechanism because I thought it was too good to be true. About halfway through my trip, I missed him like CRAZY and really started to fall hard. He felt the same way. We said “I love you” the day after I got back, were engaged three months after that, and married only 13 months after meeting. And I wouldn’t change a thing. This is from the day M was born…

Wow. That did make me feel a lot better. I’m all smiley now. 🙂 I hope you all have a wonderful night!

• Have you ever been set up or on a blind date? Or give me a happy love story or a dating horror story if not.
• Don’t forget to ASK ME ANYTHING if you want to get a question answered for the November Q + A series!