Earlier today, after sharing my goal of cooking more new things but holding off until post baby, I began thinking of how I anticipate that time to come. I can’t help but look forward to many things.

I want to cook more again...after things settle down a bit and we no longer have people stocking our pantries. I want to sleep on my stomach again…when my boobs aren’t too full and uncomfortable from all the milk production. I want to get back into my workout groove and see the changes in my body again. And I certainly want to cuddle the little man.

I love pregnancy, but do have difficulty with feeling like I’m not fully myself. I’m much more emotional and moody. I miss striving towards various fitness goals. I prefer my typical eating habits and not the crazy fullness fluctuations I currently experience. I long for the days I have the energy and physical capability to be the active, fun mom and play more with my kids. Right now it hurts to carry M, have her sit on my lap and lean against me, or run around outside with her.

I have just under 4 months left to this pregnancy. Initially, that feels like a lifetime away. Then, I recall the preparation we still have to do. Like getting some new “big girl” furniture for M. Painting two rooms. Rearranging the office into an office/guest room. Cleaning out and organizing the office and the closet to M’s “big girl” bedroom.

I realized 2 of the 4 months will revolve around the holidays. And oh yea…I really don’t want to have to be cramming things in at the last minute to finish renovations like we did before Makenzie. We remodeled our entire upstairs ourselves while I was pregnant with her. We had the final touch of carpet installed on a Friday…I went to the hospital the following Monday. Yea. No repeats of that, please!

Oh, shitake mushrooms we really don’t have much time left!!! Plus, I like my sleep. Baby, I can wait. Maybe, I’m not as impatient as I thought. 😉

• What types of things do you get impatient for?
• Do you ever think something is really far away, but then it ends up being much closer than expected? I always do. I’m a huge procrastinator because I always think I have plenty of time. Good thing I tend to work well under stress.

Happy Thursday evening! Can you taste Friday yet? I’m glad you all found humor in my dark side of pregnancy post from earlier today. As much as I joke, I do love being pregnant. Even when things don’t go as smoothly as planned. In fact, my 6 month check-up this afternoon kind of let me down.

Most of you know that I have no desire to know my weight gain during this pregnancy. I don’t mind the number on the scale, but simply do not care to know it. Too many people emphasize it as the “be all end all” to determine the health of a pregnancy. I do not agree with this thinking. I believe that each body will gain exactly what it needs to in order to support a baby if you eat a mostly nutritious diet, eat when hungry, and stay moderately active. That is how I approach my pregnancies and I never doubted it.

Today’s appointment affected my will though. Despite numerous times asking not to know my weight, the midwife blurted it out. The nurse didn’t say anything because of my request, but since I forgot to specifically tell the midwife she “brought up her concern for the jump in gain this past month”. Apparently, I have gained 9 pounds over the past 4 weeks. My initial thought was OUCH! I felt guilty and kind of mumbled “okay, I’ll pay closer attention and be careful” in shame to my midwife.

Later, after reflecting on this, I got a bit angry. For one, everything else checked out perfectly fine health wise. Two, my total gain (which of course she told me) is only 13 pounds at 6 months along. The average woman should gain 25-35 pounds during pregnancy. Only about 7-10 pounds of that gain is in the form of fat. The rest is fluids, blood, baby, placenta, enlarged breasts/uterus, etc. Lastly, I know my body!

I know with M I gained 1/3 of my total weight gain in month 5, which is the month I just got through. My weight gain slowed down and I trust it to do the same this time around. I know I have not put on an excessive amount of fat this month because I feel the gain in my breasts and belly. I popped big time this past month. Everyone who sees me has noticed it.

I also know that I do not sit around and gorge myself. I admit to eating more…because I have truly been hungry. Even though I don’t show all my meals on this blog, joke about eating loads of candy corn, and share my out to eat ventures, on the whole I know I eat well. I have some sort of oats mix for breakfast, leftovers or a sandwich with fruit for lunch, a bowl of cereal for a snack, and mostly healthy dinners that include lots of veggies and whole grains. Yes, I have a small sweet treat every day and an extra more indulgent meal or two on the weekend, but its not enough to load an extra 5+ lbs of unhealthy weight on me. Check out the pics below – on the left me at 6 months with M…on the right me at 6 months with B.

I still work out 4-5 days most weeks, guzzle water, and pay close attention to my body as well. I take care of myself! And to be told I’m not doing that and need to watch it bothers me. I will certainly pay close attention to my choices after that visit, but I refuse to not eat when hungry or deny myself anything deemed unhealthy for fear of it making me fat during pregnancy. If for some reason, the extra weight gain continues I will take a closer look. But I know my body. And I know it appreciates how I treat it. I’ve learned the hard way that the most important thing is to trust yourself. I’ve been through a lot learning just how to do that. No one will make me question that. No one.

• Have you ever had to trust your body over what a doctor says?
• What things really irk you? Obviously, I get frustrated when people don’t honor my requests or question my habits.