i HAVE WEAK MOMENTS

Posted: September 8, 2010 at 4:35 pm

I have my weak moments as well. I do not deny how far I have come. I can still rely on my capabilities to push past negative moments as swiftly as possible. However, they do still arrive. In many various forms. Days come where I feel like a failure. Where I ponder if the things I work hard at possess the same worth I place in them. Where frustrations, what-ifs, and not-good-enoughs wrap their claws around me. The past few days left me with the following thoughts and emotions:

1. Is the 30 DSLR really doing what I hoped? The 30 Days movement started off as an incredibly powerful force. I could feel the energy from so many bursting forth. As the week went on, the fire dimmed. I expected as much since the initial moments of anything spark more interest that won’t necessarily last. I also expected lower participation over the weekend, especially a holiday one. I guess maybe it comes with not expecting it to drop by half and to have people seeming to want nothing to do with it anymore. Only a week in. Will this even be what I hoped at day 30? Will it even have a shot of continuing past September to have the chance to reach even more lives?

buttonimage

I want to clarify right here and right now that I do not do the 30 DSLR for attention, blog visits, pride, etc. I hope it comes through that I care and believe in this. I want more than anything for this to reach as many as possible and for it to provide the same start of hope and joy to them as it gave me years ago and continues giving me to this very day. I must also admit though, that I have allowed myself to get caught up in my hopes and expectations instead of trusting. Today I received a very special email showing someone believed I could help and a few comments that affirmed why I do this. I put a lot into it and I want it to go as far as possible. God will handle that though. And I need to stop worrying if the reach appears to have lessened. All that matters lies with giving this my heart and letting God do the rest.

2. Am I doing enough to support my family? M had a doctor visit today for some pretty nasty looking bumps on her eye and nose. The husband didn’t think she needed to go and it would pass on its own with the hot compresses + Neosporin we’ve been using. I said I must take her to the doctor in case its an infection. What was the protocol? You guessed it. Compresses + Neosporin for the nose. And a $100+ bill coming our way, thankyaverymuch

IMGP6774

I’ll admit that I felt guilty. For costing us that unnecessary money and not really contributing fiscally towards it. I tutor to help earn a bit of extra income, but it isn’t much. I want to pursue writing and love doing the blog but the mere pennies from that doesn’t mean anything financially. Emotionally, for sure! But I can’t pay a medical bill with my happy blogger feelings. I sometimes get caught up in how I should do more.

I know better though. I know I should count my blessings for the opportunity to be home with my children and pursue my dreams. For having the time to do things I care about (like the 30 DSLR). I know that doctor bill won’t put us in the hole and I simply protected my daughter by bringing her there. I know I do not sit idly at home and that I work very hard. And that one day I will work very hard again in a traditional sense with some form of income. I also know others face much more difficulty financially and we are very luck to have what we do. Why should I complain?

3. How come I can’t do things this pregnancy like last time? I feel like I have grown quite a bit in the past couple of weeks, which happens typically around the 5.5 month mark. I notice softer and more cellulite-y thighs, a wider/flatter butt, and less definition. I know its normal and it will come off. Yet for some reason, this time frustrates me. My body aches worse than it ever did with M. This week the only workouts I have the stamina, energy, or capability of handling consist of brief walks. I know I need to listen to my body, but I will say it’s hard. Since I refuse to change my eating habits based on activity and trust my hunger, I also have encountered my mind questioning certain things like my daily handful of candy corn as a treat.

IMGP6776

I had the most difficulty overcoming the negative thought processes of the first scenario. Probably because it so deeply involves my heart and I can’t get reassurance as easily as I can from my husband. Certain occurrences today reaffirmed me though and I now feel better. My daily Bible verse I receive fit perfectly too - “Teach me to do your will, for you are my God; may your good Spirit lead me on level ground.”  Fortunately, the other two lasted less than a day…or even half a day, but I felt compelled to share them.

I don’t have it all together. I simply do my best. Each and every day. I still need those lessons and reminders on perspective, trusting my body, confidence, love from others, and putting too much emphasis on looks over the true gifts of the body. Perhaps that is why I want so much for 30 DSLR to reach others. I still see it playing out its positive effects in my life. Years later. I give a very heart-felt thank you to each of you who participate. Thank you. And thank you for allowing me to vent on and on in this post as well. 😉

  • What types of scenarios hit you the hardest? Can you relate to any of my weaker moments?

Tags: , ,

 
73 Comments to “i HAVE WEAK MOMENTS”
  1. I get discouraged thinking that I’m not doing enough, not building my resume, taking too long to complete school, not being a good friend, etc. But you just have to keep going, and do the best you can.
    Btw, you look great! I’m so scared of pregnancy 😉

  2. Ah, Tina! I want to give you a HUG! BIG HUG!!

    As far as the 30 DSLR–I had a harder time doing it this weekend bc I got out of my daily routine. BUT, what I did do is read through them on Monday and reflext on every single one. I also plan on using these to go back through when I’m feeling the need once September is over! plus, I referred a friend here and I think it will help her–even if just 1 more person participated the rest of the month–itd be worth it!

    as far as M goes–you only did what you thought was best and that’s all you can do.

    • Tina says:

      Yea, I knew the weekend would have a bit more of a lull like it always does. And I felt so silly worrying about it but I had to be honest in the post. I do want this to reach people. And I always said if just one person got something out of it…its worth it. I still stand by that, even if my mind tries to make it more complicated and put doubt in me sometimes.

      • Kristie says:

        I’d say remember too that even if someone doesn’t comment or receive your daily emails, it doesn’t mean that they don’t value these posts or really need them. 30 days of deep, real posts is heavy stuff – not the “fluff” (I don’t mean this as an insult to anyone) that people might normally post about – and I know some mornings it’s all I can do to read it, jot down a couple things I want to reflect on while I’m on my way to work and at work, and head on my way. What you’re doing this is a huge blessing to others though, Tina. Just remember that!

  3. we ALL have weaker moments. it’s only natural. w/ my wedding coming up i’ve been finding myself picking apart my body more than i should be lately. i just want to feel my best on the big day, but that shouldn’t be about my appearance. it should be about the love between me & my fiance. i just keep reminding myself of that and also reminding myself that i AM healthy & that’s what really matters.

    • also, i wouldn’t feel the least bit guilty about taking m to the doctor. you never want to be left thinking “i should’ve taken her.”

      • Tina says:

        yea ever since last year when we had to take her to the hospital (i’m sure you remember that!) I have been more doctor nazi. LOL

        And thanks for sharing your weaker moments too. I really appreciate it. I’m feeling a LOT better now than I was and get past these things much quicker, but they still come up. Thanks for being there for me, Julie. 🙂

  4. Never blame yourself for being a mom… Its our instinct to make sure we’ve done everything we can to make sure our kid is Okay.

    Your 30 days of self love is fantastic… I truly hope everyone understands that 🙂

  5. Leah says:

    Sorry to hear that you are doubting yourself. I’m loving the 30days of self love — even if I haven’t been able to post everyday. With a wedding, school starting, moving houses, etc somethings just weren’t possible — especially when writing (about emotions & thoughts) isn’t my strongest skill.

    As for you daughter, glad to hear that the doctor feels she just needs the cream and compresses. I, too, would have taken her in to have them checked. Eyes are important, and something to be looked at…

    You are looking great! And yes there seems to be more and more aches with each pregnancy. My third I was barely mobile!

    Prayers to you today for your strength and courage — thank you for sharing!

    • Tina says:

      Thanks! And I don’t expect each person to comment every day. I know that would be unrealistic. I am feeling much better about everything. It was a weak moment where thoughts that weren’t even truly ME got the best of me. Thanks for your prayers.

  6. Aww, Tina. You sound like you need a hug. A verbal one will have to suffice. 😉

    I, for one, am glad you’re doing the 30 Days posts. Even if I don’t always comment (or write my own blog post), I still think about the topic … maybe not as much as I should, but sometimes ANY reflection is better than none. You know what they say: A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.

    If your movement helps change just one person’s attitude, you should consider it a success. (And I know it’s reaching more than just one person …) Thank you for doing this.

  7. We’re our own worst critic I think! 30 DSLR is so amazing! I see it all over the place! 🙂 And really as long as it helps just one person it’s a complete success! (But I know it will reach far and wide)

    I’m like that with my dogs, they go to the vet over the smallest things. I say I’m paying for peace of mind.

    I can so relate to number 3, but have to say I’m loving your baby bump!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <3
    I'm thankful you wrote about it, because I really thought I was the only one losing muscle tone and endurance….
    And in my opinion candy corn is a vegetable, so no worries on that front!

  8. Tina – remember that you are such an inspiring and uplifting person and that’s why I started reading your blog in the first place. Your inner beauty will always be there, negative thoughts or not.

    I can relate to this. I have bad days too. I stepped on the scale this morning for the first time in months. And to be honest, I wasn’t happy. Enter negative thinking. We are all human and we are not perfect. I think that so much in the blog world, we see bloggers eat perfectly, run 8 minute miles and still have time to make complicated recipes for dinner. But we don’t know what happens in the other 22 hours of their day. They may fight with their significant others, eat a pint of ice cream, or but choose not to blog about. This is why I love your blog – you say what is really on your mind and hide nothing.

    • I totally agree with Maria! It can be hard to get caught up in others’ lives through their blogs, but I know that I for one don’t always post about every scoop of ice cream I eat, or the nights when I eat watermelon and half a jar of peanut butter for dinner. And a lot of my recipes are made on the weekend, but I post them during the week, because those posts are easier to handle when you get home late after battling traffic and you are too tired to even read 2 pages in your book before bed. We all have moments where we feel like we aren’t good enough or happy enough, and even though I am at a point in my life where 98% of the time I feel wonderful and self-confident, I still step on the scale and still have days where I am “down.”

  9. LindseyAnn says:

    1. Do not doubt the DSLR. It is amazing, and it will continue to be amazing! Even if it’s only something you do, it’s still an amazing idea and movement. 🙂
    2. Taking her to a doctor was a smart idea, even if it just confirmed what you already knew and were doing. It’s is MUCH better to take her and know you’re already doing the right thing than not. You may have saved yourselves much more in the long run by spending that $100 now.
    3. You look amazing! This is one time to just trust your body and give it what it needs. You also might be more fatigued and achy this time around because now you have little M to chase after and care for, whereas last time you didn’t.

    As for me, I’m anxious right now because I’m not working. There are times where I feel like a lazy bum because I’m not getting up and going to work every morning. However, I’m reminding myself that I do contribute in non-monetary ways by handling all the cleaning and cooking and things like that (and the big things like painting the entire bathroom!). My job will come, subbing will pick up, and then I will have more money to help, but I’m focusing on the little things I can do and am doing for now.
    Smile! 🙂

    • Tina says:

      You really brought up a lot of good things for me. That I’m still doing things to help and it matters. I’ll have time to work for money in the future. Right now it’s better to work for family needs.

      And great point on not having a kid to chase the last time. I had much more time to relax when pregnant with her. Makes perfect sense!

  10. Stacy says:

    We all have our weaker moments. I see your decision to take your baby girl to the doctor as a courageous one. Sometimes a mother must fight for protecting her baby no matter what the cost 🙂 I have heard from many women that during the second pregnancy they tend to gain their weight sooner, but all balances out in the end. It seems that you are making wonderful decisions in caring for your body and your baby boy, listening to what it needs. And if it needs pumpkin candy corn, so be it!
    As for the 30 DSLR, I am grateful for it. Without it, I would not have reflected every day on the relationship that have/had with myself. This has helped me to discover that we are never alone in facing any type of problems, especially those that we face with ourselves. You are an inspiration too many women out there. They are probably reading it and are the silent followers. I know I was one for over a year! Many are afraid to speak up and voice their support. Thank you for your creativity in addressing topics that I would have never thought of for 30 DSLR. Thank you for inspiring me everyday. Thank you for motivating me to become a better person and want to touch others outside the blogger with this amazing message! 🙂

  11. Stacy says:

    Also, I want to add that you look beautiful with your baby bump!

  12. Mark says:

    The last time you were pregnant, a delicate young lady was developing inside of you. This time round you are host to a strong young man. Of course it’s going to be different, we’re practically a different breed.

    Just like every young lad, he’s awkward, demanding and an unbelievable drain on resources. Also, a quick question… have you ever seen a boy’s bedroom? Exactly. Until he’s born, that bedroom happens to be…err…you! It’s okay to feel like you’ve been in the ring with Tyson :p

    I wouldn’t worry too much about a handul of this magical candy corn, although eating sweets will play havoc with your blood sugar levels. Having highs and lows in your energy may not be that helpful, if you’re feeling the strain 🙂

    • Tina says:

      You always know how to make me laugh! If this pregnancy is any indication, you’re right..this kiddo is all boy! 😀

  13. Dana says:

    Hi Tina! I just discovered your blog last week and I must say I am very encouraged by your posts, especially by the way you share your faith through them. I’m a believer as well and just started my own blog (over at mylittlecelebration.com) and I want to be intentional about doing the same thing as well.

    I also stay at home (no kids yet) but I’ve had days where I feel like cleaning the house or cooking or running errands don’t do much for our family. But, my husband has reminded me numerous times that the things I do for us, no matter how insignificant I think they are, bless him tremendously. And that he loves working for us so I can pursue my passions, make our home and prepare for motherhood. So I would encourage you to keep doing what you’re doing and press hard into God’s Word daily, because you are precious in your husband’s sight and in your daughter’s sight, and especially in God sight.

    • Tina says:

      Thank you so much for that reminder. I am loved and needed and supported. I have so many blessings. Thanks for all your kind words.

  14. This made me sad 🙁 But at the same time so…happy? Haha. You’re honesty and the way you’re handling the various situations in your life is so refreshing. YES, crappy times will always come. And NO, we will not always be strong in the midst of them. I like how you’re sort of pointing to the fact that it’s *okay* to be weak! In fact, that’s how God wants us to be.

    Sending hugs your way. As cliche as this sounds, everything will work out – just keep resting on Him! xoxoxo

  15. oh sweetie, hang in there. the same thing happened with Faces of Beauty, and i’ve been doing everything i can to remove MYSELF from it and let God do his thing. It’s not about the quantitative value but more so about sharing your heart. let me know if you ever need to talk 🙂

    • Tina says:

      Yep. I realized I was letting worries about values outside of God’s reach come into focus. That’s not what I want. Such a reality check. I’m feeling much better and I’m sure we will talk soon enough. 🙂

  16. homecookedem says:

    I am LOVING your 30 Days movement!! The passion and love you pour into it is amazing. I wish I could participate even more, but it’s hard to spend lots of time on the computer right now with the craziness of school and getting things done around the house too. But I am reading and enjoying all of your wonderful messages!!! 🙂 You’re doing a great job. Even if some have lost interest, that doesn’t matter. You never know what sad, lost woman (or man!) is out there reading these posts and having their lives changed for the better. I can tell you truthfully that your messages definitely echo in my head throughout the day and I even found myself talking about “perspective” with a co-worker today. So see, your messages are even being spread outside of the blogging world. Keep up the great job!! 🙂

    • Tina says:

      Thanks, Em! 😀 And that’s the thing…when I started I had no expectations except to write the messages God gave me. Somewhere along the way evil thoughts seeped in. That’s the only way I can describe it. I can’t doubt what God gave me to do. So I’ll keep on trucking with joy because its for HIM!

  17. Ameena says:

    I would have taken Maya to the doctor with something like that as well, and because of our crappy insurance we would have definitely been hit with a $100 bill too! I feel your pain Tina!

  18. Tina. Thank you for your truly heartfelt honest post. I think that it is good for everyone to be reminded that we are all human, that we all have our moments of weakness, that nobody is perfect. We all have our insecurities we try to overcome, and if it was easy, then 30days of self love wouldn’t be necessary.

    What you have through this has inspired me to share and open up more honestly with and about myself to my readers. It has allowed me to do a lot of self reflection, which for many people can be difficult.

    Don’t think you are alone, as you are here to support us, we are here to support you.

  19. Julie says:

    Tina,
    I’m sure other mothers have already chimed in that you definitely made the right call with taking M to the doctor. I’ve gone in for MUCH less and the reassurance was worth every penny!!!
    Take care today!
    Julie

  20. You look great! Don’t worry about it!

  21. Katie H. says:

    Aw honey, I’m sorry you are having doubts. I personally haven’t commented on some of the posts yet because I’ve had a lot of stuff due at work and want to comment and reflect intelligently, you know? I think what you are doing is fantastic.

    I hope little M feels better. You are an amazing mother.

    • Tina says:

      Thanks! And I don’t expect comments from everyone everyday. I don’t know what came over me to let that bother me. At the start, all I wanted was to write what God gave me to share. I’m feeling better now. Thanks!

  22. If you reach one life or change one thing in one person’s life, 30 Days of Insight is a success. As a participant, I can confirm it is a success. I love my 5 minutes everyday and don’t see me giving up this “me” time after the 30 days. I have already, in one week, felt a change in my appreciation of myself and that extends to appreciation of others around me, too.

  23. Samantha says:

    I love love love the 30 DSLR. I’m a new reader to your blog and I can tell you, you’ve taught me so much about how to eat instinctively, and through your 30 day challenge, and through God of course, I’ve drawn closer to Him.

    I saw your post on the Yada Yada prayer group book and wanted to buy it / borrow it from the library. And as luck would have it, my future sister in law ( who had no clue I wanted to read this book ) lent it to me. So far it’s so good. I even woke up today just wanting to praise God like the character Jodi in the book.

    We all go through times of uncertainty. I’m a mom too and know how hard mom guilt can feel. But as long as you’re doing the best you can, and trusting the rest to God, that’s all you can ask for.

  24. I love how much effort and passion you put into what you do. It’s inspiring. Please don’t feel down. As you know through all of our blogs- we all have our weak moments and moments of doubt. But it takes a strong person to confront and conquer them! Remember- you are beautiful and capable of anything!

  25. Tina, your 30 DSLR is amazing, and I hope that you realize the incredible impact you are having on each and every person that participates. You are 100% correct that initial buzz always fades, but those that are sticking with it are those whose lives will be touched in ways that none of us can probably even imagine right now. Please don’t lose faith in what you’re doing. Your heart and soul truly shine through each post and inspire me every single time!

  26. honey, you are doing a fabulous job at hanging in there and holding it all together!

    your kid and the dr. damned if you do, damned if you dont. i would have brought her knowing in the back of my mind it was probably nothing but erred on the side of caution and i hate “wasting” money but you did the right thing, you just never know and if it was something the guilt would have eaten you alive.

    hang in there!!!!
    xoxo

  27. Michelle says:

    Aw Tina! I hope you feel better after venting. You know, it sounds like your perfectionism is getting ahead of you! 😉 I know it’s hard not to get down a little when you feel like you’re being “set back”. Isn’t it funny though, how when we feel down, we take it out on our bodies or food?! I do the exact same thing. “Everything is going wrong, I’m getting fat, time to go on a diet.” Or “Everything is going wrong, time to eat a bag of cookies … Damn it, why did I do that.”

  28. I can for sure relate. Everyone has these things to deal with, I do think.
    The thing that hits me the hardest is when someone I care about and put trust and faith into, fail me. I know we are only human, we’re not perfect, we will be dissapointed by other humans.. but it hurts. The pain is awful and sometimes it makes you wonder if trusting others is even a good thing?

  29. Kia says:

    I love the 30 DSLR. I read your posts daily but will likely not comment often because I am not always comfortable sharing the results of my contemplation. I suspect there are other lurkers like myself out there.

    My weak moments come when I focus on what others will say about how I look or what I have done. I am slowly learning that usually it doesn’t matter what others think or will say. Very slowly.

    • Tina says:

      Thanks for your comment on this post. I really appreciate it. I went into this with no expectations and knew everyone wouldn’t comment for a variety of reasons. I’m glad to be reminded that this still reaches byeond what I may see. Thank you. 🙂

  30. You’re amazing, Tina. Just wanted to let you know that:)
    I have what I call “weak days” or “weak moments” when I seriously doubt myself. What I was confident about yesterday is somehow impossible the next. It’s weird, but I know I’m not myself, and that it will pass. Sometimes it’s easy to feel defeated, but it will usually pass within the day.

  31. I love how you can be so open and honest on your blog. You did the right thing taking M to the dr. Just think if it had been infected you would be kicking yourself more if you had not taken her. You were just taking care of the most precious thing in the world.

    You also look beautiful pregnant. I can relate so much to the way you are feeling right now. I feel huge at this point and am only a little over half way done. I do not think I was this big at this point with B. It is normal for the second pregnancy to feel different in what you do and the way your body is. I had this conversation with my OB. She said the majority of women that have a second child pop sooner and also feel “heavier” than they did with there first. Whether or not they actually weigh more or less the body and belly just feel that way. I am so happy to hear and see that you listen to your body when it is hungry or wants a treat. I stuggle with this daily but try to do the same.

    I think your 30 days is awesome as well. I come by every day to read and reflect. I do not comment as I have bit off more than I can chew in my daily/personal life at the moment. Just know that some people may be reading but just not commenting.

    Keep up the awesome work that is your blog!

    • Tina says:

      Thanks Brooke!! I knew coming in that not everyone would be able to comment and I don’t know what twisted games my mind was trying to play in darkening something I already knew and that didn’t bother me before.

      And good to hear I’m not the only one that feels heavier and more uncomfortable. LOL

  32. Jessica says:

    Thank you for your honesty. You are inspiring.

    Thank you.

  33. I don’t know how to comfort you, but I want to offer a huge virtual hug! I just started blogging and reading your blog, but your faith and perseverance are huge inspirations to me…not to mention your fitness levels! I know without meeting you that you are going above and beyond your call of duty.

    The 30 DSLR has been so influential to me. It is not only about love, but about sharing those positive thoughts with others, and, more than that, about sharing our weaknesses and encouraging one another to grow in our strengths. I am personally so grateful that you put the time into the 30 DSLR, and I enjoy reading and relating to each post. I hope you feel as happy with the challenge as it has made me feel so far!

    As far as the pregnancy body and family contributions go, just remember that you are carrying and caring for life–that is the most precious thing you can ever do. I commend you for even being brave enough to bring children into the world (there are so many aspects of baby-making and baby-having that scare me lifeless), and the fact that you commit your time to raising them is wonderful. Your family is lucky to have an introspective, caring, and generous mother!

    I know how hard life can be, but struggling is totally normal and it will pass. Please keep your chin and your hope high. You are an incredible woman!

  34. Dorry says:

    Such an honest post – I definitely relate to your “weaker moments” – I have them all the time. I just try not to wallow in them – the same way you seem to be doing and shift the focus back to God. I think you are amazing and thoughtful and inspiring. Your heart and soul goes into each post and it shows. xoxo

  35. Hallie says:

    First of all, oh wow you are so cute with your baby bump! I hope I look half that adorable when I’m preggo. Second of all…AWW poor M, I hope she feels better soon.

    And third of all, I know I said this before, but my life is so insane right now that I don’t have time to comment on your 30 DSLR posts, but I really love what you’re doing and plan on going back and doing some more reflecting on it. So, even if not all of us comment, what you’re doing is really powerful and means a lot so please don’t lose hope!

  36. Meg says:

    Please don’t give up on your 30 days of self love. You never know who might really need to read what you have to say. Even though I don’t have time to comment every day, I have read every single one.

    Funny thing about life is it just happens. Us women need to stick together about the reality of life, cellulite and all. I think it’s pretty brave to admit that! That’s what I like best about your blog. There’s nothing fake about it. Everything is genuine and real and very relatable. Keep up the good work and never give up on your dreams! 🙂

  37. Big hug, Tina. You wrote about love from others, well please know how much LOVE is headed your way right now.

    We are all weak. We are all imperfect. We all fail sometimes, and we question our reality and our worth. But no matter what we are experiencing, it does not change God’s reality. His truth is that He loves you and cares about you more than you could ever imagine. He meets you in your spots of weakness, He will lift you up. Life can be hard and there are bumps in the road but there is a glorious reward in all of this. Please know how much you are loved!

  38. Nadia(sunshine) says:

    I’m so glad that you share your insecurities – and how timely considering this post came right after your 30 days post about perfection. It’s so easy to hide behind a facade of “perfection”, it’s much more difficult to admit to weaknesses – especially in such a public forum as a blog.

    By the way, I am REALLY enjoying the 30 days posts. They are coming at a very important time for me. Thank you for them.

  39. […] take a moment and declare my gratitude for all the warm comments and support I felt from you after last night’s post. I do not know where those dark forces came from to try to make me doubt this initiative. Going […]

  40. Shannon says:

    I can’t offer anything new that hasn’t already been posted, but I think you are doing an amazing job…for your readers and your family and your health. For me, I don’t have time to read and comment on a blog more than once a day, so although I read through your reflections, I am more apt to comment on a post about your day/life/baby(s). But what you’re doing is appreciated.

    I can completely relate to the financial concerns. I went back to school this past year and do feel guilty for not contributing financially. My husband doesn’t look at it that way at all, but I still feel that way. We are contributing in other ways…if fact, if I went back to work after the baby is born, I would be working just to pay for child care. Not worth it to me.

    Lastly, I think its absolutely okay to get frustrated by the toll pregnancy takes. Its sad that pregnant women feel the expectation to be happy and glowing all the time. I dont feel that way at all, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t thank God everyday for the little boy growing inside me.

    You’re doing a great job 🙂

  41. Lindsey says:

    Aw, girl. You are doing amazing things. Try not to feel down. About this pregnancy not going like the last one, that is normal. (not to be a downer but…) Each of my pregnancies were harder than the one previous to it. By my third I could barely walk in the end my hips hurt so bad. And all of the pregnancy pains came earlier and earlier and worse and worse every time. I don’t say this to discourage you. Only for you to know that it is normal and you aren’t doing anything wrong. Love you babe!

  42. Nichole says:

    You made so many brave statements. And you are such a fighter, you always put on your game face when the time comes. I am proud of you for recognizing life isn’t always roses, but you can walk away with so many wonderful things. Hugs!

  43. I’m going back and catching up on your blog. I really applaud you for blogging about your true feelings and thoughts. I feel like one day I will be going through the same thing and I will think of all the other women that went through it.

  44. Kristy says:

    Virtual hug is in order 🙂

  45. Lauren says:

    Thank you so much for doing 30 DSLR, Tina. You are bringing joy and perspective to so many people out there. I was just telling my husband last night how grateful I am that you started this. I’ve been in a funk for a few months now over my job search and this came at the perfect time. The negative self-talk and self-doubt get to me all the time, and I often think, why can’t I do better? We are living on my husband’s full-time salary and my part-time minimum wage salary right now and have a very small cushion every month, and I feel guilty all the time for not being able to contribute more. However…I’m not Superwoman and am doing the best I can. I think that’s all any of us can do – our best given the situation, and rely on God to take care of the rest 🙂 We’re all in this together!

  46. I get discouraged in my job and trying to find what i truly love doing not just what I happen to be good at. Right now I am at a stand still but I know that things will change eventually.

    As for the 30 Days – i am loving it. I am doing post on my blog as a way to reflect on my life and the things I have learned. This has ben eye opening for me and such a release. I truly appreciate you doing this.

  47. Hey friend, I guess I’m reading this late, but I just wanted to send good vibes your way! You are such an inspiration and an amazing blogger. I love keeping up with your posts! You always seem to have a topic that I NEED that day!! Don’t worry about numbers and stats! I used to obsess over it and now I barely check because I just don’t care. If people like me, then they will come back. If they don’t, that’s their loss! I think we all want to make it big and be the next Caitlin and have something amazing like OB. BUT, it’s a hard thing to come by. Just keep doing what you are doing and God will steer you in the right direction! You are awesome and BEAUTIFUL and adorable as a pregnant mommy!! Have a good day!

  48. All of your DSLR posts are great, and while I don’t post or comment on all of them, I do reflect on each one… often saving it in my feed reader until I have a time to truly absorb what you’ve written.

    I think all of us have these kind of doubts about ourselves from time to time, it’s part of being human. The true power comes in recognizing and taking active steps to improve your thought process (which is much easier said than done!).

  49. Kelly says:

    I just wanted you to know that I have been reading (almost) everyday and have enjoyed every minute of it. You are doing a great job with this blog, class, Mom to M. & as wife to P. I feel blessed just knowing you. Keep up the good work!
    Hugs

  50. […] talked about having weak moments and how it’s okay to not be […]

Leave a Reply

(required)

(required)


 

 
Catch Up With Recent Posts

Announcement Time

Posted: November 23, 2011 at 7:47 am

Well, I have had a whirlwind of a few weeks over here. I missed all of you so much! I can’t express enough gratitude for your patience while I got some important things sorted out. Some scary things. Are you ready for the announcement? Here goes! I will no longer be blogging at Faith Fitness […]

88 CommentsRead more →

Self-Love Reflection: The Road Not Taken

Posted: November 20, 2011 at 11:47 am

Hello FFF readers! Nice to meet ya! My name is Carissa and my husband and I blog at Fit2Flex.  Well, I blog…he consults! We are both certified personal trainers with a passion for healthy, active living and clean eating.  I am also studying to become a registered dietitian, a race announcer, and a runner.  Stop […]

24 CommentsRead more →

Healthier Eating For Kids

Posted: November 19, 2011 at 10:56 am

Thanks to Plum Organics for sponsoring my post about tips for baby feeding magic. What if you let baby choose what’s for dinner? Check out their cute "Quest for Yum!" video and see what happens! As parents, we want the best for our children. We help them to feel loved. We strive to teach them […]

14 CommentsRead more →
 

Announcement

Posted: November 17, 2011 at 3:36 pm

Hey, everyone! I wanted to pop in and say I am working on some new and exciting changes.  As a result,I may not be posting as much during the coming week.  Please stay tuned for the big announcement! Love you all! And still feel free to find me on Twitter and Facebook for the time […]

21 CommentsRead more →

Where The Change Happens

Posted: November 16, 2011 at 7:54 am

It’s kind of funny. I become a certified personal trainer and the first workouts I turn to this week come from someone else. The book came in for me at the library last week and, after flipping through it, I couldn’t wait to give the circuits a go. Making The Cut includes a lot of […]

79 CommentsRead more →

From Beginning To End

Posted: November 15, 2011 at 11:53 am

Good morning! First off, thanks for the many congrats yesterday. Love you all bunches for the tons of support you have given me in so many things this year. I hope I can return a little bit of that love through this here blog as well. So yesterday I had my first parent-teacher “conference” for […]

55 CommentsRead more →