Self-Love Reflections: Confidence

Posted: January 16, 2011 at 8:33 pm

If you missed it earlier, I announced that I will be revisiting the topics discussed during the 30 Days of Self-Love. Many newer readers have shown interest. I also believe the topics discussed can always benefit us. So, I will re-publish one of the topics each week on Sunday evening to guide us into the week. I hope its enjoyable for all, newer and older readers alike. Time for topic one!


When trying to decide what topic would best suit the start of self-love reflections only one thing came to mind. Confidence. Confidence portrays so much beauty and strength, yet somehow always seems just out of reach to achieve. Why? Because we don’t believe we deserve it or fail to see what we have to feel confident about.


That’s right. We each have something in which to lay confidence. All of us have unique strengths and qualities that we should not ignore or gloss over, but instead lift up into the light and proclaim as our own with pride and joy.Those things which we can take ownership of in confidence come in many shapes and sizes. You can see it in your mad cooking skills, your ability to make others laugh and laugh with them, your giving of love for a friend/spouse/child, your ability to push your body in a workout, your smile, your good sense of style, your mind and ability to problem solve, your compassion on others, your go with the flow demeanor…ANYTHING!


Do not forget your strengths by focusing on weaknesses, because we all have those too. BUT those do not define us. Our strengths define us. Something else to remember. You are stronger than you think. You may not believe so, but you have the power to change everything. You have the power to turn your life into something beautiful. You are reading this post and stepping out to love yourself more, then in turn love others more, and then have the potential to change more than you imagined. Yes, YOU! Each of us have that power and simply moving, or even desiring to move, towards a positive place speaks volumes.


Be confident in what you can do! Trust in yourself and the changes YOU can make and that can happen in you. We all start somewhere. I did too. I knew I couldn’t keep half living and things didn’t change in one day. It hurt and many tears fell on my path. They still do. BUT I knew change was possible and that I could be that change. I did gain confidence in God, but I still had to do the actions. If I can do it, you can too. Take those steps and remember how wonderful you are. BE CONFIDENT TODAY! Tell yourself you can do this. You can change your outlook, your focus, the message you share. You can!

It's not who you are that holds you back, it's who you think you're not. ~Author Unknown

We have to learn to be our own best friends because we fall too easily into the trap of being our own worst enemies. ~Roderick Thorp, Rainbow Drive

Take a few moments to quietly reflect on confidence and recognize what you have to offer. You have something! Whenever you feel down, remember who YOU are and what you have to be proud of. What do you have to be confident about?

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39 Comments to “Self-Love Reflections: Confidence”
  1. I cannot even tell you how much I love you right now. Confidence is probably the #1 thing I struggle with as a person on a daily basis. It holds me back constantly, and I hate that about myself! I have definitely gotten better at it, but know the more confidence I have, the more dreams and accomplishments will happen!

  2. Errign says:

    I love these posts!

    What do I have to be confident about? I’m a strong, empowered, successful, smart woman with the ability to run miles without stopping, cook delicious food, and make people smile (including myself!)

    In fact, it took the pain of my recent breakup to remind me of all this – that I am amazing. The boy I was dating was not confident and had low self esteem & I spent too much time trying to boost his self esteem and confidence instead of focusing on all of my own amazing abilities. 🙂

  3. Ok, that first quote…thank you. Awesome.

  4. Emily says:

    Beautiful post Tina! This is something I have struggled with for so long and am trying really hard to find in myself. I’ve always had a hard time seeing what others see in me and being proud of my own accomplishments. I still have my list of positive traits from the last time you did 30-days of self love and refer back to it when I’m feeling down <3

  5. What a GREAT post. Sometimes it’s hard to not get lost focusing on my weaknesses and therefore no longer even recognizing my strengths.

    Something you said has really hit me today. You wrote, “I knew I couldn’t keep half living” I’ve become so scared of failure, or maybe it’s change, that I really feel like I’m half living. There are so many things I want in my future (a family, a different career, a healthy lifestyle) and yet I’m not doing anything today to slowly make that happen.

    I think it’s time to take some steps. I can do this.

    Thank you 🙂

  6. “Go confidently in the directions of your dreams!”
    I LOVE that quote.

  7. Robyn says:

    I like the idea of you revisiting 30 days of Self Love. Yes, I was here for the first go round. Confidnece is a great post to start with.

  8. Becca says:

    I meant to tell you this before, but I think it’s great that you’re doing 30Days again. I was here for (at least most of) the September part, and appreciated the posts! I’m glad to see you’re revisiting them!

    As far as confidence goes… I lack it. A lot. I’m always comparing myself to other people, always putting myself down in some way, shape or form. I have really bad self-esteem/confidence. I’ve been working on changing that around (that was part of the point of starting my blog, focusing on positive things), but it gets tough sometimes. I needed this post, especially now—our small group tonight just talked about stepping out and reaching lost and hurting people. You can’t do that without confidence! So thanks! (I suppose I should say “Thank you” to God, too, for timing! :))

    And as far as what I’m confident in, hmmm… See, that’s where I have problems. I can tell you what I’m NOT good at, but for some reason I can’t list a positive to save my life—or, if I do list something positive, I worry that it’ll get shot down by someone. Sad. We’ll change that, too!

    Also, LOVE that first quote! 😀

    • Tina says:

      You help bring a positive light to young girls lives. You brighten my day as well with each of your comments. You definitely have something to be confident about – your ability to support and uplift others. I’m sure there are many more too.

  9. Allie says:

    This is such a great post 🙂 Confidence can be a HUGE issue and i’m so glad you addressed it! Thank you :)!!!

  10. Stephanie says:

    For too long I equated confidence with being cocky or egocentrical. I think I feared being a confidant woman because of how I thought I would be perceived. Thank you for this post. A great reminder that there’s nothing more powerful than a human being living a purpose driven life fully knowing and believing in their own abilities. 🙂

  11. Brittany says:

    Some days i have a lot of confidence, some days not so much. Something i’m definitely working on, and i think will get much better– as i love myself more and lose weight 🙂 Thanks for such a great post!

  12. This is an awesome post!! I think its so important to have confidence. I’ve always been really confident in my personality. As a person I’ve always really, really liked myself. But I’ve lacked a lot of confidence in my appearance for a very long time. I think blogging has really helped with that. I can take 40 pictures of myself, and only post the best one. Then I look at it and think “I really do look good”. Its been great for me.

  13. i love this post! i struggle with a lack of confidence a lot too. am i a good enough writer to finish this paper? do i look pretty enough compared to these other girls? am i running fast enough?

    some days i feel pretty good about myself, some days i’m in the middle, and some days i really am not confident at all. hopefully i can learn to make all of my days good days.

  14. This is purely and truely beautiful, and definitely words I needed to hear on this crazy day! Thank you!

  15. I love this, thank you 🙂

  16. Angela says:

    You always make me feel so good about myself Tina!! Today I’m confident about my body’s physical strength and abilities. Thanks for this post. 🙂

  17. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Tina Reale, Tina Reale. Tina Reale said: Self-Love Reflections: Confidence: If you missed it earlier, I announced that I will be revisiting the topics di… […]

  18. I love that. Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. I need to write that on my mirror!

  19. Today, I’m confident in my ability to handle with grace everything that comes my way.

  20. Wow, this is beautiful. Confidence is one thing that I must continually work on and you have given me something new to reflect on. I believe God’s gifts are meant to be shared and when I loose confidence I loose opportunity to share the light, but like the 2nd quote states, I can be my own worst enemy at times. Thank you for sharing this post.

  21. Thanks Tina!! Reading that was such a wonderful way to start my day!

  22. Awesome post, Tina. Confidence is a major player!! It took me awhile to find myself and my confidence!

    Today I am confident that I am doing the best I can when it comes to my kids.

  23. This is beautiful, Tina!!!! I think I am going to LOVE this series that you are doing.

    Most days I am very confident, and I truly am proud of and believe in the person I am/am becoming. It’s those days when I feel really sad about only being a part-time worker that I start to feel down. I mean, I didn’t get my undergrad degree at a good school to be 9something bucks by the hour… But I also know I have to work my way up. it sure makes things hard though (budget wise when it comes to food/rent/bills). That’s when my confidence goes down…

  24. Jolene says:

    Confidence is and always will be very difficult for me…but this comes at exactly the right time as I really need to channel that confidence, whereever I can, with my new job, in particular. Thank you for posting this today!

  25. Thank you for this Tina! I grew up with very little self confidence and I was the girl who apologized with everything I did or said. I didn’t feel worthy of anything. When I strengthened my relationship with the Lord it really brought everything into perspective and helped me see that I am worthy.

    • Tina says:

      That helped me a ton too. Thank goodness for Him and remembering the love He has for us. How can you feel unworthy when considering that? 😉

  26. […] Tina totally made my morning. […]

  27. What a great post! This is something I really struggle with. Thank you!

  28. Awesome! I love reading the responses. I feel most confident when I am working toward goals. Without goals and hard work, my confidence diminishes. I guess, for me, confidence is related to ability.

    On the whole, I am a really confident person. Being unconcerned with social structures and peer pressure really helped that cause. I have always felt that it is best to do what you know is right regardless of what ANYBODY says. So far, so good.

    The only time I feel self-conscious is when I am around my boyfriend. Even after recovering from my eating disorder, I still have this nagging feeling that I must be perfect for him. So annoying!

  29. Heather says:

    Loved this: “It’s not who you are that holds you back, it’s who you think you’re not.”

    I like a lot of people struggle with my self confidence. I feel I am getting better at taking risks and trying new things, but since I’ve been a perfectionist for most of my life, that desire to be great at everything I do kind of goes hand in hand with the confidence thing. Since starting my blog, I have really started to acknowledge that I do in fact have a gift when it comes to cooking. I’m no professional chef or anything, but a lot of times, things just come to me. I starting to not be as “surprised” when dishes I make come out well and instead just tell myself, “See, I knew you could do it!”

    Thank you for this post!

  30. Liz says:

    Confidence…just getting started AGAIN with exercise and eating healthy it is very easy to lose confidence in myself. Everything is more difficult than it used to be. There was a time when I could do aerobics (that’s what it was called way back then) for hours! Now, I can barely make it through a 30 min workout with my trainer! I have actually felt like I might throw up 🙁 And figuring out how to eat “clean” is like learning how to eat and cook all over again.
    It is so exciting to begin a new journey and it is also scary to attempt something that is so very important and fear falling flat on face (FFOF).

    Thank you so much for doing this post!
    Here’s to not FFOF ;^)

    • Tina says:

      Things will take time to adjust to I’m sure…but you can definitely do it! Remember, every little thing done for our health counts towards a greater and bigger picture. You got this! 🙂

  31. […] Question of the Day – What about your body amazes you right now? Remember – be confident! […]

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